Our Journey Into The Wilderness

Part 5

CAMPING IN THE EMIGRANT WILDERNESS – BEGINS AT KENNEDY LAKE

From our time and experiences together, our bond deepened during our brief and wondrous time in Nature.

May 8, 2009 – Friday

It has been a week and one day since our return from Del Valle. This is my first entry in the journal since returning.

I took Shiloh to the dog park in San Ramon and I brought along the book I was reading while in nature, it was, “Aldo Leopold, His Life and Works.” While reading it, it brought back to my mind, our magical experiences at Del Valle. I feel the urge to go back into nature, and to once again be out in the Nature with the plants, the trees, the wildlife, and with my companion, Shiloh. I feel there is much more we need to see and experience in our natural world.

I began making tentative plans for Shiloh and I to spend a couple of weeks in the wilderness, up in the high country at the end of May or the beginning of June – all depending on money and the weather.

Our week back has gone surprisingly well. Shiloh is enjoying his new temporary home and for me, I didn’t mind staying in an unfinished house, with my bedroom walls with its exposed studs, as with most of the lower and upper floors. The unfinished Living Room that was turned into my office so I could work when there was work. It wasn’t what one would expect to live in, but it was a roof over our heads. And it is an experience living with my friend. Shiloh really likes him for some odd reason that I cannot figure out. My female dog Shawnee really liked him too.

The nights have been restless for me and I am having a difficult time getting to sleep, but I feel rested and in good spirits in the mornings. I feel my life has been rejuvenated by our experiences in nature, and in having found a new love and profound relationship being out in nature. A deep relationship I did not know could have existed with nature.

Shiloh is by my side always and sleeps in the bedroom with me on his bed. He is always with me, we are always together.

There is a small green belt between the development where we are staying, and Shiloh and I take our morning and afternoon walks there. There are lots of tree squirrels, and turkeys Shiloh can chase, and we meet new people friends and dog friends on our walks. Shiloh is always excited to meet new people and dogs unlike his dad.

Along one side of my friends house is one of the entrances to the green belt and a nice grassy area Shiloh likes to hang out on. It runs along the front yard to the rear yard of his house with a nice wide open area to the green belt. Sometimes I take a break from my work to just enjoy hanging out with him, laying on the cool soft grass by his side, giving him soft and loving scratches. Feeling very grateful for having Shiloh in my life.

Sometimes I will read there with him, sometimes I play ball with him. I let Shiloh spend a lot of time in this grassy area while I am working inside during the day and he spends a lot of time there during the early evening. He likes watching what is going on in the neighborhood. Because he likes it so much there, I let him stay out there as much as possible, being that it is much better him enjoying the outdoors rather than being cooped up indoors. He just likes laying there, and on occasion, gets up to chase a squirrel running along the top of the fence line, where it will then jump onto a tree branch of a pine tree. Shiloh will watch it scamper around from branch to branch, then will soon tire of it, and return to his grassy spot for more important matters.

Getting back into the process of working was not much of a chore, but after a couple of hours into it I would soon find myself getting bored with this routine I have been doing for so many years, and finding myself thinking about Shiloh and I being in the wilderness together. I would get restless in my work, and in thought, thinking about camping again and what other work I could do besides Architecture. I was getting burned out in doing Architecture and I really wanted to do something where I could possibly make a positive difference in the world. This was not a mid-life crisis, but rather a strong defining purpose I felt I needed to participate in. This is why I had planned my 5 year horse packing trip to bring awareness to what we are doing to the natural environment, and to give my support to Native Americans in some meaningful way.

During our stay at Del Valle, I was thinking about doing something different as a business because I felt I could not rely on Architecture and the uncertainty it brings in down economic conditions. I had also wanted to get out of the profession for many years.

Our government, the Federal Reserve and business scholars were projecting a very long and slow recovery for our economy that will impact the middle class, and the poor greatly, but not the 2%. And like many Americans who have been directly impacted by this great recession, they have been forced to find other alternatives of employment, if they can even find it. Their are those that have to work three jobs, just to put food on the table for their children – many are suffering. It is a total disruption of millions of peoples lives. The difference for me is, I welcome the change, and have a clear direction where I want to go, yet it still has not been easy. But Nature has shown me a beautiful path to take, and what is truly important.

I thought about what I could do that I could really enjoy and have purpose. And having Shiloh being a part of it. I was being drawn to nature in a deep and very profound way.

I have done a lot of reading and studying on wilderness bushcraft, and survival skills, and thought it would be great to possibly teach those skills to others. I also wanted to spend more time on a personal level in practicing these primitive skills to enhance my experiences, and creating a deeper connection to the very essence with the natural environments. I wanted Shiloh with me on this exploration in the wilderness. I am also concerned that the wilderness areas are at high risk of being destroyed due to man’s disrespect, and disregard of the importance of these precious lands, and the life that relies on them. By the government’s growing restrictions of the wilderness areas to the public, and the corruption between the governments, and large corporations that allows greed to take precedence over public access to lands, and the health of the natural environment. The ever increasing threat of gas and oil cartels, and mining industries that further encroach upon, and in the raping of public lands. These very greed driven corporations that feels no remorse or responsibilities for polluting the lands, air, and water that impacts all life. And the threat, and destruction of pristine wilderness, and the overall environment, and the very threat and survival of many species, including the human species going extinct due to climate change. Something that we seem not to be too concerned about in our overall collective consciousness. We have lost our connection to the very thing that gives us life.

Everything about being in nature, from the wildlife to wild edible plants, to the medicinal plants and trees, and even to the poisonous plants, to being able to feel comfortable spending a lot of time alone in the wilderness, to gaining a deep and profound respect and appreciation for nature, to being able to survive if required using primitive skills, really got me excited about these possibilities and much more. And most of all, being able to experience these adventures with Shiloh.

I was reading about a homeless encampment in Sacramento and thought about going there to camp out and write about the experiences there, as with telling stories of the people. Shortly after reading about it I found out that the city was going to kick everyone off the land that was owned by the Union Pacific Railroad. It was just another use of force to hide what is really happening to our country, and not willing to help those in need respectfully. There was not any rational reason to kick them off, but simple those, the railroad, did not want them there. A typical scenario that has been used for over three hundred years by our government in removing the Native Americans from their lands.

A sympathetic and caring land owner offered a piece of vacant land for them to use temporarily. His property was next to an upper middle class neighborhood and was causing a lot of uproar and resistance with the neighbors. That was short lived and the homeless were once again required to move.

Work has been still pretty scarce for me, but I am able to bring enough in to survive. I am not sure what the year will bring as far as work goes. I guess all I can hope for is enough money to survive and camp and hope the following year will be better.

During the following weeks in May, I was working and planning our trip to Kennedy Lake in the western Sierra Nevada mountain range, a part of the Emigrant Wilderness area. We will depart from Kennedy Meadows Resort where the pack station is.

I was getting enough money to make the trip and I was just waiting for the weather to get better in the high country to make it to the higher elevations of Kennedy Lake. I had never been there and did not have any idea of what to expect. I hadn’t been backpacking since the late eighties and doing it alone would definitely put a different spin on the whole experience, I would say.

I chose Kennedy Meadows Resort because it provided everything I needed. I had lodging, a small store, and restaurant, and a pack station.

Waking up to this place I have never been before, I looked around and then looked at my perceived limited options, and uncertainties. They looked discouraging at best, and my thoughts concluded, “I cannot stay here, I have to head back into nature.”

I wanted to do the trip alone with Shiloh to see if I could indeed be out in the wilderness alone.

Henry David Thoreau write about being alone in the natural world, “I love to be alone. I never found the companion that was so companionable as solitude.”

“In solitude the mind gains strength and learns to lean upon itself.”

~ Laurence Sterne (1713 – 1768)

“Only by going alone in silence, without baggage, can one truly get into the heart of the wilderness. All other travel is mere dust and hotels and baggage and chatter.”

~ John Muir (1838 – 1914)

“Willing to experience aloneness,
I discover connection everywhere;
Turning to face my fear,
I meet the warrior who lives within;
Opening to my loss,
I am given unimaginable gifts;
Surrendering into emptiness,
I find fullness without end.

Each condition I flee from pursues me.
Each condition I welcome transforms me
And becomes itself transformed…”

~ Jennifer Welwood

“It is clear that we must embrace struggle. Every living thing conforms to it. Everything in nature grows and struggles in its own way, establishing its own identity, insisting on it at all cost, against all resistance. We can be sure of very little, but the need to court struggle is a surety that will not leave us. It is good to be lonely, for being alone is not easy. The fact that something is difficult must be one more reason to do it.”

~ Rainer Maria Rilke (1875 – 1926)

“One travels more usefully when alone, because he reflects more.”

~ Thomas Jefferson (1743 – 1826)

“I wander’d lonely as a cloud That floats on high o’er vales and hills, When all at once I saw a crowd, A host, of golden daffodils; Beside the lake, beneath the trees, Fluttering and dancing in the breeze. Continuous as the stars that shine And twinkle on the Milky Way, They stretch’d in never-ending line Along the margin of a bay; Ten thousand saw I at a glance, Tossing their heads in sprightly dance. The waves beside them danced; but they Out-did the sparkling waves in glee: A poet could not but be gay, In such a jocund company: I gazed-and gazed-but little thought What wealth the show to me had brought: For oft, when on my couch I lie In vacant or in pensive mood, They flash upon that inward eye Which is the bliss of solitude; And then my heart with pleasure fills; And dances with the daffodils.”

~ William Wordsworth (1770 – 1850)

“There is sanctuary in being alone with nature.”

~ Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I found many quotes on being alone, and could not help myself in sharing them with you. And though I will not be totally alone, Shiloh will be my companion, I think of being alone, is being alone from any contact with another human being for companionship. Being alone in quiet and peaceful silence.

I had been spending a lot of time in the few weeks I had, in reviewing my wilderness books and DVD’s to help get myself prepared for this trip and to work out what wilderness skills I wanted to practice while up there.

I wanted to experience, and connect deeply with Mother Nature. To feel in my very Being all that she could teach me. To feel the ground beneath my feet with every step I take, to feel the plants, and trees, to feel the animals that present themselves to us, to the flowing streams that gives life’s blood, to the sounds of nature that brings life in the air.

“You must be willing to acknowledge the connection between you and that plant, or you and that animal – and from there, to embrace the inescapable conclusion that whatever is done to the earth is also done to yourself. In its highest form, this awareness asks you to be responsible not only for your own property, and your own family, but to the entire planet and the family of all living things.”

~ Tom Brown Jr.

Being alone in the wilderness can stir up our most deepest fears. Feelings of having little control over our situation; feelings of uncertainty, confusion and panic, may rise up into our being; the fear of wild animals coming to get us; the loneliness and vulnerability we may feel when the darkness of night comes upon us, and possibly, the fear of dying alone if something happens to us like a serious injury, or a serious illness, or from the frightening thoughts of starvation. These feeling become very real if help seems so far away and with little knowledge to fall back on in a survival situation. Even with the knowledge of survival, one can still fall into deep despair, uncertainty, and panic, especially if alone.

“We need to move beyond talking about the environment, as this leads people to experience themselves and Earth as two separate entities and to see the planet in terms only of what it can do for them.

Change is possible only if there is a recognition that people and planet are ultimately one and the same.

You carry Mother Earth within you, she is not outside of you. Mother Earth is not just your environment.

In that insight of inter-being, it is possible to have real communication with the Earth, which is the highest form of prayer. In that kind of relationship you have enough love, strength and awakening in order to change your life.”

~ Thich Nhat Hahn

My first experience in the wilderness was with two friends back in our youth in the early 70’s. We hiked into the backcountry at Devils Post Pile in Southern California in the Mammoth area. It was a three day trip in the month of July. This was prime mosquito season and my only true memory of this experience was a constant attack by thick clouds of mosquitoes everywhere we went. On our return, I counted 55 mosquito bites on me. To say the least it was a trip I wanted to forget. It was miserable hauling all that weight on my shoulders and dealing with bugs continuously.

Although for the most part this was a miserable experience, it was my first introduction into the wilderness and that part I did enjoy kind of.

A very good friend of mine, Greg and I would occasionally get together to play tennis and at that time we worked for the same company together. I quit my job there in the late seventies to seek another employment opportunity that ended up falling through. So I was jobless. Greg ended up quitting the same company and since we were both unemployed Greg talked me into taking a two week long trip into Arizona. He had an old beat up military green Pacific Telephone van that we used for our travels into the Southwest. It was a great trip with a lot of things on our agenda that we were able to accomplish and we were able to do it for very little money. I think we had about two hundred dollars each.

We began our trip on April 30^th and planned a four day backpacking trip into the Yosemite wilderness just above Hetch Hetchy Reservoir. We camped in the Yosemite Valley the first night in one of their campgrounds, the next day we drove to Hetch Hetchy Reservoir and started our hike into the wilderness. It was a great trip but was very exhausting hiking with heavy backpacks, and a lot of switchbacks . Since it was in May there were no bugs which made it much more pleasurable. We hike about six miles to Laurel Lake and camped there for two nights then hiked to a higher elevation lake called Lake Vernon and there we stayed one night. On our return to Hetch Hetchy Reservoir where we had parked, it was a ten mile hike. Back at the reservoir we had our first very close encounter with a black bear.

We went on to take two more backpacking trips together some years later.

I had been planning this trip into the wilderness for months. I wanted to do a two and a half week stay some place in the high country of the Sierra Nevada mountains. The last time I was in the high country was back in the 80’s with my long time friend, Greg. We did a few backpacking trips together. One trip was down by Mammoth at Devil’s Post Pile and the other two were above Hetch Hetchy Reservoir (one I had mentioned previously). Each trip consisted of four days and we planned the trips for late spring to avoid those nasty, biting, blood thirsty pests, the mosquito.

The experiences were always enjoyable with my good friend, but the fact is, backpacking is hard work and physically exhausting. I was always glad it was over after the fourth day. I tried talking Greg into practicing survival skills while we were in the backcountry. Actually, I told him we should try surviving with very little the next time we go. He never liked that idea of mine. If I was able to talk him into it, we would have had a hard time with it, being ill prepared for such a trip, and we would probably have failed miserable with disastrous consequences with what I know now, but doing it with Greg, we would have miserably enjoyed the experience I am sure.

As I have learned with plant identification, it is extremely difficult to learn, and being in the right season for the plants and fruits one is looking for. This also applies to all survival skills as well. A lot of hands on experience is required to even master the basics, and can be very time consuming. It could take many hours in the field to master these skills. But is well worth it once they are accomplished with a feeling of complete satisfaction.

With work and the constant, and frustrating issues with money, as with weather delays, I decided to plan our trip for mid June, and I was going to use a Horse Pack Station to pack our things in. Me and Shiloh would hike in. Our destination was Kennedy Lake – an eight mile hike from Kennedy Meadows Resort. Kennedy Meadows Resort is a popular place for its trout fishing. It is located off of Hwy 108 and right before the beginning of the accent up Sonora Pass.

The reasons I wanted to take this trek into the wilderness for two and a half weeks was for three reasons: The first was to learn and practice survival living or survival skills if you will, second, to reacquaint myself once again with nature ,and third, to see how I would do alone in a wilderness environment.

Learning survival skills is something I have wanted to do since the early 80’s when I picked up a book from my local Library. The book was the Air force Manual for Search and Rescue entitled “SURVIVAL”, dated August 15, 1969. When I read the book I was excited about the possibility of being able to rely on skills and ones imagination and ingenuity using only what nature provides and some basic man-made items to survive in the wilderness. The movie Jeremiah Johnson with Robert Redford was a movie that lead to inspiring me as with another movie called the Wilderness Family that peaked my imagination to this end. As a child I would dream of being alone on a desert Island or up in the high mountains somewhere, living off the land. Many earlier movies played a role as well in my love for the wilderness and adventure.

One of my childhood dreams was to own a horse and I finally got to own six horses, and now my dream and passion is to be self-reliant living in the wilderness to study and reconnect with nature. I also have to add, that once I began reading more about Native American cultures as with other indigenous cultures and their relationship with nature, the interest began consuming my passions in learning as much a I could by living with the land.

Getting reacquainted with nature was something I have wanted to do since the late nineties. I began looking at my life in a different way during this time, and this process moved me into looking at what is really important in my life. Because of my love for nature, I wanted to reconnect with her on a much deeper level.

As Edward Abbey wrote about nature:

“But love of the wilderness is more than a hunger for what is always beyond reach; it is also an expression of loyalty to the earth which bore us and sustains us, the only home we shall ever know, the only paradise we ever need – if only we had eyes to see.”

Our planet gives life to every organism that exists on Earth. The basics for life for all creatures on this planet are air, water, sun light, the darkness of night, fire, and land to grow and to keep us grounded, and in harvesting plants, and animal food sources. If we did not have these things, we would simply not exist. I began really appreciate everything in life from a simple flower standing alone to the awesome complexity and vastness of our universe. My internal feelings go with the idea that we are all related to all life, not just to our own species. We have a biological and spiritual connection to the trees, the plants, the fish, the animals, to the insects, to everything. Our whole world is a symphony of life, beauty, grace and wonder. But few of us see this connection in our everyday lives, and in our synthetic world – in our make believe perceptions of the world we believe in our minds as being true. Our modern day lives, and the way we think, actually moved us away from the innate connection with Mother Earth. And it only took us a few hundred years to accomplish this in America. And in those short few hundred years we have caused serious harm to the planet, to the point of possible global disaster from Global Warming and Climate Change, and we still continue doing the same things ignoring these facts. We turn a blinds eye to these environmental problems because we have been so conditioned to rely on others to fix things for us and thus take little or no responsibility for our own actions and how our actions may impact our world in an environmental, in the biodiversity, sociological, and economically. The impacts will be great. It will change the as we know it, and there will be no turning back.

…”Modern man no longer regard Nature as being in any sense divine and feels perfectly free to behave towards her as an overwhelming conqueror and tyrant.”

~ Aldous Huxley

“As explorers cocooned in cagoules and overtrousers, it is easy for us to become remote from nature, confident that we can for the most part ignore it’s influences. But if we are to be truly competent we must strip away our synthetic shells and learn to be an integral part of our surroundings, moving in tune with the spirit of the season. For our guidance we can draw from the accumulated learning of our aboriginal ancestors, who, recognizing their dependence upon the earth, lived in sympathy with it.”

“Come alive again, the forest’s store of resources is newly available. To those who know about them, there is a glut of materials to make life easier. Learning where and how to find them is a large part of outdoors understanding and essential knowledge for those who would discover greater self-reliance and freedom. All of nature’s gifts are given freely to those who show proper care and respect. The iron-clad rule we all must obey is to gather in a sustainable way, utilizing without destroying the resources we depend upon.”

Taken from Raymond Mears book “The Outdoor Survival Handbook.”

There are many great writings, wisdom, and knowledge to point us, and direct us back on the path in our connectedness, and deep relations, and reverence with the natural world. Will we heed such wisdom? Much of this wisdom and knowledge can be found in traditional indigenous peoples throughout the world.

To prepare us for the hike in the mountains, Shiloh and I took daily hikes in the beautiful foothills of the Tri-Valley, in Pleasanton, California, so as to strengthen our legs and endurance, and absorb the beauty in nature.

There were a couple of new things I wanted to try making to take for the trip. They were bannock and pemmican. In the end I only made the pemmican. I got the recipe from one of the DVD’s I had on survival skills. It consisted of tallow which is a substance made from rendered animal fat, air dried lean beef hamburger meat, dried potato flakes, flour, garlic power, onion flakes and a touch of salt and pepper. It can be used as a topping for a fry bread, or pizza or mixed with a stew for additional flavor. The tallow I made was a somewhat a long process, especial looking for the right fat. I finally found a place that carried it in Livermore. The tallow has many uses. Some are for cooking, candles, and fire starters. If prepared properly, it can last for up to a year with proper storage.

My first attempt in making the tallow was a rip roaring failure, because I used the wrong type of fat. And it was a very time consuming mistake. Rendering fat, needs constant attention so as not to burn the fat, cooking it enough to remove all the water content from the fat, and it takes a long time. It needs a hard animal fat for it to work. It took a few phone calls to find this type of fat and it is not cheap. I thought it would be throw-away trimmings, but I guess it is in big demand and very few people carry it. Some butchers did not even know what I was talking about.

After cooking my second batch of tallow I was beginning to see success. I filtered the rendered fat a few times to remove all the remaining fat chucks and I set it aside to cool and begin hardening. I then put it in the refrigerator to harden completely. When I was ready to make the pemmican, I heated up the tallow enough to soften it and then added the pemmican mixture. I made enough to give me a large ziplock bag full.

A week prior to our departure day, we were busy picking up supplies that we needed for the trip, food, clothing, and miscellaneous camping supplies (most of the camping gear I already had) and organized everything I was to bring including the kitchen sink.

June 8, 2009 – Monday

It was about 10:30 am when we got started on the road for our adventure into the wilderness with a full tank of gas, and a map ready. My truck bed was filled to the top with camping gear. During the three and half hour drive, my mind was filled with excitement, apprehension and uncertainty. Shiloh was in the back seat of the rear cab with his head out the window, thinking, “where are we going now?” Shiloh had no worries, and for me, it was another story. Questions like, can we make the eight mile hike? What will it be like at our final destination? Can we be alone for two and half weeks? Will Shiloh be okay? And I experienced the excitement of really doing it, and most important, doing it with Shiloh. It was like two buddies planning an adventure together and finally experiencing that reality, but I was the only one worrying about it. The responsibility fell all on me to keep both of us safe. The closer we got, and the realities we face, the many thoughts playing in my head. The drive was uneventful.

Once we arrived at Kennedy Meadows Resort, a peaceful calm, and excitement came over me. We parked in the parking lot next to a small meadow area that leads to the river, and on the opposite side was where the lodge was that housed the office, restaurant, and the general store. It was a beautiful day. I let Shiloh out and we took a walk to the river so Shiloh could get a drink and play in the water. It seemed like he was excited to be up here, but had no idea of what was going to be in store for him, or myself for that matter. As usual, Shiloh attracted a lot of attention.

After our short walk to stretch and smell the fresh mountain air, we headed for the office to check-in. We got our key to our small one room cabin we were to spend one night, and arranged to be packed out the next morning.

The lady asked me, “how long are you going to stay up at Kennedy Lake?” And I confidently said, “two and half weeks.” And she responded back with, “Wow, that is a long time.” I proudly, and confidently said, “yep!”

Kennedy Meadows Resort is a popular gathering place for the fisherman and for those who just want to relax in the mountains. There is a campground area next to the resort for those who want to camp in their RV’s or in their tents. It is the typical campground that is jam packed with campers, side by side with no room to spare. If you can imagine camping in a sardine can and this doesn’t bother you, then this place would be for you.

Kennedy Meadow Resort itself is tucked in a beautiful valley that provides pretty much anything one would want in a simple mountain resort. It is at an elevation of 6,200 ft. The people are friendly and the atmosphere pretty incredible. They rent different size cabins from the very small (which I got) to the larger cabins for the whole family. They have a general store, a saloon and a restaurant. They also offer horseback rides and of course horse packing trips. The resort is right at the west side base of Sonora Pass and just off of Hwy 108.

The restaurant serves a simple menu and if you are really, really hungry the food is okay. One really can’t go wrong with the breakfast and burgers but is still basic (and it is hard to screw up breakfast and a burger). For me, I add lots of Tabasco for flavor both in my burger, and breakfast. to a but I find the dinners less than desirable. I think the restaurant would do much better if they focused on providing good meals and hired a chef who knows how to really cook, but they seem to do fine with simple cooking. Since it is the only place in town, one does not have much choice unless you want to do the cooking. I have a tendency of critiquing restaurants for food quality, because I enjoy cooking and enjoy food that is prepared properly. If I had to rank the food, it would be in the lower scale from 1 to 10. Maybe a 3 or 4 if that. The breakfasts and burgers I would rate a little bit higher. One strong indicator that has not failed me yet in telling if the food is going to be good quality is the quality of their salads. I love salad, and if the restaurant serves me a quality salad, I know the food will usually be in the excellent category. What you get at the restaurant at Kennedy Meadows is a salad consisting of iceburg lettuce, tomatoes wedged in quarters, to large to eat and have to be cut, and too many beets. To me, this is not a salad, but more like rabbit food.

We headed for the small cabin near the general store to unload the truck. Once everything was unloaded we relaxed for a bit. The small cabin was filled with our gear with little room on the floor for a spot for Shiloh to sleep. We went out for another walk by the river and just looked around the place. When it was time for dinner, we got something to take out and ate at the cabin. I ordered chicken and a salad and both were just okay. I actually think a fast food restaurant would have better food. After I ate my dinner, I then began to organize all my gear and realized I had way too much. I left the front door open, so Shiloh could lay on the front porch and keep an eye on things. I weaved through all my stuff in all my bags on what needed to go with me and what could be left behind. I brought a lot of gear for the two and half week stay as far as food and clothing, but also certain gear to test to see how it would perform and a duffle bag full of books on survival skills, wild edible plants and of course my journal. Unfortunately I did not bring a camera, although I wish I would have.

To keep the cost down on the pack animals, I was figuring on using just one pack animal with a packing weight limit of 150 pounds, but looking at all the gear I had, the only choice would be to dramatically cut back on the things I wanted to bring or go with two pack horses. I chose the additional pack horse. Since I have taken two six day horse packing courses, I had a pretty good idea of how everything is packed and how many animals would be required. Though I thought.

The journey begins on a cool June morning at 4:00 am. It is June 9, 2009, on a Tuesday. It was a rough night with very little sleep. I had that constant nagging voice in my head, are we going to be able to hike the eight miles and once we get there, what will we find? Since I have never been up at Kennedy Lake, I had know idea of what to expect or where we would end up camping. I got up, took a shower, got dressed then took Shiloh for a walk so he could do his business and then I wanted to get him fed. While he was eating I began packing up the truck with all our camping gear. After finishing packing, I drove the short distance to the loading dock for the unloading of the truck and the reloading of the pack animals.

We were told we would have to be at the loading dock by 6:30 am sharp, so that meant getting to bed early and getting up very early to get everything done that needed to get done. I took one bunk and Shiloh took the other. He decided he wanted to sleep on a bunk too, so he climbed up on the bunk right across from me. Maybe he thought this is what you do when going camping. Two buddies sleeping side by side awaiting for the next day of our adventure together to begin.

June 9, 2009 – Tuesday

I dropped by the office to go over where the wranglers were going to drop off my gear. Since I had no idea of the wilderness area we were going into, it was like telling a blind man where he wanted to be led. I was really hoping they would recommend a spot they thought would work. While we were discussing possible campsites, one of the wranglers said, I don’t know if there is going to be any firewood up there. Hearing this, I thought this could be a big problem for me because I did not bring any back-up stove for cooking. I was going to rely on firewood for all my cooking needs as well as for heat and the comfort of having a fire. I was thinking to myself, “no firewood? How can that be?” Every time I have been backpacking we always had enough firewood for fires. I thought we wouldn’t be high enough where we would be in the subalpine regions. I was also not planning on bringing an axe with me, just a small hatchet I had purchased before the trip. It was small and light weight and thought it would be perfect for this trip. I asked the outfitter if I should bring an axe, and he said, yes. Luckily I did decide to bring the axe, because I found out later while up there that the hatchet was totally useless. It had its uses, but not for chopping firewood. One of the things that is recommended when one decides to practice survival skills is to bring backup equipment just in case you might need it. So my philosophy was always to bring back up food, and back up equipment. The only thing I was lacking was the stove and I was sure I would be able to find firewood up where I was going. I would also recommend listening to the outfitter to be safe, and not sorry. This could have been a very dumb assumption on my part regarding the availability of firewood and it could have determined if I was going to stay or leave. Because I had so much equipment, it wasn’t like I could just pack up everything and find another campsite. I would soon find out, this trip would be one of my great learning experiences being alone in the wilderness thus far.

After we got everything set with the pack animals, I went in for a light breakfast nervously awaiting our first step onto the trail. In my mind, I was not in the best frame of mind. After breakfast, we got the gear we were going to take from the truck for the hike. Shiloh carried his own food (unwillingly at first) using his dog panniers and I carried a day pack and brought my pistol and holster with me. I really can’t remember why I brought the pistol with me, but it was a big mistake. I thought it would be easy to have around my waist, but it was heavy and cumbersome. After a short distance I took it off from my waist and stuffed it in my day pack. Shiloh was trying to figure out what the heck he was carrying on his back and why. He soon got used to the panniers. Again a feeling of uncertainty entered my mind whether we could make the trip. I think I was more concerned with Shiloh than for myself. I know I would probably be tired, but deep down inside I knew I could do it. It became more of a mind challenge than based on any reality. There was no question that we would make it, but there was that, “what if we can’t” question stirring in the back of my mind.

Once we got going on the trail and we were only about ten minutes out, I dropped my canteen full of water. When it hit the ground it split at the seams of the canteen making it useless. I thought maybe this was an omen, and the beginnings of a string of bad luck. Luckily I had an extra canteen in my gear. I learned from my camping experiences, you can never have enough water containers. When backpacking you have to keep the weight you carry to a minimum, so you limit yourself to maybe two water containers. But if you don’t have to worry about weight, the more the better. With one canteen down, I had one other, and three water bottles.

Drinking lots of water is a priority in a survival situation or in a non-survival situation. A person should try to drink at least a gallon of water per day while in a wilderness setting and may vary some on extreme conditions such as being in extreme cold and extreme hot areas where you may need two gallons per day. The higher you are in altitude also plays a factor in your water consumption. So a simple rule is, drink lots of water. You will find you will use a lot of water for cooking, washing, and brushing your teeth, etc. Having to constantly go to your water source can take up a lot of energy and if you are in a survival situation, you want to conserve your energy.

I was finding the trail not that difficult and I would even consider it a somewhat easy trail and easily visible the whole way. Some areas of the trail needed my full attention while walking on its rocky uneven surface, so as not to trip or stubble causing a possibly serious injury. Being alone, I looked at the trail with respect, knowing if I was careless I could easily have been injured by spraining an ankle or breaking a wrist or worse falling down into the rocky gorge below where if the fall didn’t kill me, the torrent waters would. I took my time keeping an even steady pace for myself, and then there was Shiloh. He trucked along the trail like it was just a stroll through the park. I knew how far we had to go, he didn’t. I wondered if it would eventually catch up to him. I found myself often adjusting Shiloh’s panniers from slipping unevenly to one side. That was a pain in the rear. While on the trail I was mentally training myself to think survival and having a survival mind-set. Always being aware of the conditions and what was around me. Playing what if scenarios in my head. That probably helped in keeping my mind on other thing other than how much further do we have to go?

The day was a perfect hiking day with a mixture of sunny and overcast skies. It never got too warm. The scenery was breath taking and the air fresh and clean. I was being watchful for any possible chance of rain. Since I was constantly thinking about survival situations, getting wet could be deadly for someone who is not prepared. Usually when hikers are not aware of their situation and the conditions around them, that can get them into trouble in the wilderness. If it started raining or snowing and if not prepared with the proper clothing to stay dry, one can go into hypothermia very quickly. Many hikers have the mind-set it can’t happen to them, but it can and does. If you are alone in the wilderness, you have to take extra precautions to be safe because there maybe no one else around to help you if you get into trouble. I have a poncho with me on this hike.

One instance I remember on our backpacking trip with my friend Greg, we went into the backcountry in May in the late 80’s to Laurel Lake just about six miles from Hetch Hetchy Reservoir. We just brought sleeping bags and a thin pad to put underneath the sleeping bags. We did not bring tents. At night it got very cold and we woke up with frost on our sleeping bags the two mornings we were there. If it would have rained or snowed, we would have been totally unprepared. I remember throughout the night for both nights it felt like I was sleeping in a deep freeze container. Every time I moved, shifting my position to get comfortable, and my feet moving down the bag it was like putting my feet into an ice locker. I did not think much of it back then except for having a miserable night sleep, being very cold and it being for a very long two nights. Looking back, I could have very easily gotten hypothermia in those conditions. The things I know now could have prevented those two very cold nights and made them much more comfortable. There are many little bush skills that are surprisingly effective and fun once you learn them and use them in any camping situation.

We were on the trail for about an hour and a half and I saw Shiloh turn a corner and disappear. I heard some splashing of water and when I turned the corner, I saw Shiloh in a pond, lapping up water and wading through the pond having a very good time. I yelled at him to come, because he was getting the bottom of his panniers all wet and I was hoping his food wasn’t getting wet. Eventually he came to me and I checked for any water leakage. Luckily I had his food in air tight plastic bags that worked and was saved from becoming wet mush.

After a few hours on the trail I began thinking, it should be just around the corner and we will be there. I think I said that every quarter mile we traveled. About two miles or so further we reached the gate that led us to the main meadow of Kennedy Lake a very short distance away. Walking through the meadow for a few minutes, we finally saw the log cabin in the distance and knew we were finally here. Once we reached the log cabin – a small rectangle, one room cabin built in the 1870’s and was used by the cattlemen who attended cattle in the area during the summer months from July to October.

Because I was unfamiliar with the area, I couldn’t tell them where to drop the gear off. The packers told me they would drop our gear off next to the cabin, which they did. That was good because I thought it would be easy to find, but I had no idea of where the campsites were, and how far I would have to carry all the gear to the campsite I chose. I would learn later that most of the campsites were across the river from where we were. But we lucked out.

I found our gear in a small stand of trees a short distance from the small log cabin and about 100 yards away stood a campsite next to the river. We walked over to the campsite and I thought, perfect! It was a great looking campsite, with good tree covering, it had a comfortable feel to it, and looked like it would be perfect to fill our needs. We were sitting between the river and the meadow. I then wondered, why couldn’t they just have put my stuff at this campsite? I now had to carry all my camping gear, two pack animals worth over to the camp which was only about 100 yards away, but through a bog. I was tired from the hike and rain clouds were looming overhead of us. My first thought and priority was to get my tent up. The last thing I wanted was to set-up my tent in the rain (I was envisioning a down pour). As I had mentioned before, I was always thinking in a survival situation throughout my stay, playing through my head what I would do in a survival situation. I grabbed my tent with other gear I did not want to get wet and frantically got the tent set-up. I was hoping I would remember how to set up the five person tent I brought with us. The rain gods were good to us and held off. It was later that afternoon that we received a refreshing light rain for about half an hour.

While I was getting all the gear over to our camp, Shiloh found a nice cool, wet, and muddy hole in camp to lay down in for a well deserved rest. Fortunately most of our camp was dry. Once I got the tent up, and the rest of our gear to camp, I started a fire and then rested my tired body and aching feet for a bit. We were both exhausted, but happy to finally be here. The small alpine area we were in was beautiful.

I could not have been happier with our campsite. We were right next to Kennedy Creek in a stand of trees that gave us adequate protection from the wind, and rain, and shade from the Sun. There was a nice flat area for the tent. We have a few downed trees I used as benches next to a nice rock fire pit. For me, it had a very comfortable feel to it. A perfect place we can call home for two and a half weeks for me and my faithful and tired friend, Shiloh.

We had a great view of the east facing and south facing mountains and a great view of the lush alpine meadow. The rustic log cabin was in sight from camp to give us a picturesque view of it. The west mountain peaks also made up the boxed in type valley, where the small alpine lake sat. We felt we were out in the middle of nowhere. For that day and night, Shiloh and I were alone at Kennedy Lake. The only problem with the campsite and the area we were in, there was very little firewood. I was able to find enough wood to get a fire going that gave a welcoming feel to our camp, and gave us some warmth.

In this region of the Sierra Nevada Mountains from Yosemite Valley north to Sacramento the Miwok Indian People lived and thrive in this area. During the winter months, the Miwok would spend this time in permanent villages in the temperate foothills and in the beginning of spring, would follow the migration of the deer to the higher elevations for hunting game and gathering plants for food, medicine and raw materials. They would also spend time trading with neighboring tribes during the summer season.

Originally the Indians in California were referred to as “Digger” Indians by the whites settlers because of their use of digging sticks. It was also a racist, and derogatory name. In later years, this tribe of people were known as the Miwok, also named by the whites, which means an Indian or another person in the Miwok language.

The white man soon settled this region and had a devastating impact on the original peoples, by indiscriminate killing and forcing them into slavery. A genocide in California against the original peoples took place.

In the Kennedy Lake valley, I could imagine Indians visiting this beautiful valley for hunting, fishing, and gathering plants, as with them using the valley for their encampment for the summer month.

Most of the campsites in the valley are on the west side of Kennedy Creek and that is where you find most of the firewood. There are only about three campsites on the east side and I know why. There was firewood else where on the east side of the creek, but getting to it would have meant walking in a bog and would have been very exhausting work. Around camp the firewood was slim pickins and so was good kindling. Much of the firewood available was from downed trees that had aged making them very hard and difficult to chop. It was almost like petrified wood. The interior parts that were accessible was punk wood that was moist from the rains a couple of days earlier and from the late wet winter storm that came through.

After our short rest and a dinner consisting of a sandwich and a touch of Brandy to calm the spirits for me, and kibble for Shiloh, we took a walk to explore the area, and to see the lake. I was in awe of the shear beauty that was all around us. The high mountain peaks that surrounded us on three sides, and beyond the lake with spotted patches of snow still covering portions of the mountain’s northern and eastern exposures. The meadow was green and lush with many varieties of wild flowers in bloom, and was very boggy. There are a lot of small streams running through the meadow from the west facing mountain runoff. I learned a technique for walking in boggy areas and it worked well in most of the meadow with the exception of the deep areas. Aspens, Alders, and Willows spotted the mountain sides on the west facing mountains slopes and pine on the east facing slopes. Patches of Sage Brush were scattered throughout the landscape. Kennedy Creek meandered from it’s origin, Kennedy Lake, down to the valley floor like the trail of a snake that leaves an endless path seemingly to nowhere. The trail we took up to Kennedy Lake followed Kennedy Creek.

The alpine meadow was incredibly beautiful and serene, yet it was one very wet boggy swamp in most areas. Two trails one on the west side of the meadow, and one on the east side stayed fairly dry. I quickly learned the areas to walk and how to walk in the not so swampy areas. I felt we were in paradise and being grateful we were there sharing in this experience together. Shiloh seemed to be in his element up here. I am sure he felt a sense of freedom as I did. I did keep Shiloh unleashed for the most part, but always had his leash handy if I needed it. Shiloh always stayed close to me hiking, and in camp.

We were at an elevation of 7,800 ft. and it took some time to get use to the altitude change with the thin air. The first few days I always had shortness of breath.

Because we had our gear brought up by pack mule, I was able to bring lots of food for our trip – at least three weeks worth. I brought extra food in case we got stranded for a few extra days. For our first few days, I brought marinated chicken breasts and marinated tri-tip steaks. I also brought some lunch meats and cheese. For breakfast, we had about four or five days worth of bacon and eggs. I brought a lot of protein bars for energy snacks and I brought some snacks for Shiloh. I had also brought along the pemmican I had made for the trip. The rest of the food was prepackaged freeze dried meals. It was a bit of a challenge trying to figure out what all to bring for our long stay. I had my fishing pole with me if I got hungry for some fresh trout. Kennedy Lake is known for its great fishing.

On our first night, we went to bed early and I made the mistake of not properly storing our food away. I was told that this area didn’t have bear problems, but I wasn’t told about….

June 10, 2009 ^– Wednesday

The first night I had a difficult time sleeping with the thoughts of no firewood weighing on my mind. The next morning we woke up to a beautiful day. It was cool outside with the scent of fresh mountain air and the skies were a beautiful blue.

One of the things I wanted to practice while up here was my fire starting skills, so the first thing this morning, I wanted to do was to get a fire started using a steel fire starter or metal match, steel wool in a bird’s nest of Juniper bark. I gathered some Juniper bark from some small Juniper trees in our camp and crushed it to break it down some, then added the steel wool to the bird’s nest I created with the bark. The steel wool took right away with the strong spark of the metal match and I blew on the tinder bird’s nest and got a flame going. I also gathered wood and kindling next to the fires pit so once I got a small fire going I could begin to feed it with fuel. I placed the lit bundle into the fire pit, put kindling and a little bit of wood on it and the fire was not taking, but just smoking. I was thinking the wood and kindling must be wet. After pacing awhile in frustration I used a fire starting gel that got the fire going. My lack of knowledge in fire starting began to show, especially in wet conditions. It is easy to get a fire going when everything is dry, but being damp or wet is another story. This frustration and lack of experience would continue to show on this trip. Fire starting is truly an artful skill and I have learned a lot on this journey in the wilderness about fire starting and the importance of mastering this skill. No one should take this skill lightly. One thing I was doing is picking up twigs off the ground. If the ground is wet, they will absorb the moisture from the ground. In wet conditions that is a no, no. You will have better luck taking twigs directly from the tree that have dead twigs, and branches. But they must be dead, and dry. Once you have a good fire going with lots of heat, wet wood can be dried around the fire.

I tried out making cowboy coffee and had a cup of soup for breakfast. While sipping on my coffee, I was still thinking about my failure at starting a fire and not being use to using wet firewood. I looked around camp with very little indications of firewood and very little kindly at hand. I found myself getting discouraged with the whole firewood situation in getting a fire going, to having enough firewood to carry me through for the two and a half weeks for warmth and cooking. Everything I had for food except for sandwiches required cooking. Already on my second day I was thinking I would have to leave.

My frustrations over shadowed my common sense. One of the first things one needs to do in a survival situation is to stay calm and check out the surrounding areas to see what is available. This should apply to all wilderness experiences. I had experienced this on the next couple of trips camping – the ability to look beyond a small area within the campsite area, and to expand that field of sight to a much larger area should be one of the first things one should do while camping in the wilderness. It also begins by looking carefully at ones immediate surroundings as well. This also applies while looking for wild edibles, and other resources. So I began going beyond camp and found a good source of firewood within a short distance from our camp along side the creek. This simple process of becoming active rather than inactive redirected my focus to new possibilities. Since this trip I have used this on all my camping trips and found that an area that seems limited in resources actually has many resources available in many cases. We only need to learn to see what is around us.

Another challenge I faced on that first morning were fury critters. I had mentioned not properly protecting my food the night before from any hungry uninvited critters that may have wondered into camp during the twilight hours. I had soon realized I would pay for that mistake of being careless. I had all my food stored in duffel bags left on the ground and I thought that would be good enough for one night. I also covered it with a tarp thinking maybe they won’t be able to see the food (joking of course). I was told bears are usually not a problem up here and the packers never used bear proof panniers in this area. I figured it would be okay to keep the food only somewhat protected for one night. I was wrong. It wasn’t bears that got into the food, or raccoons or squirrel, or any other critter one might think would want to get into your food, no, it was a little critter – mice. The mice chewed through my duffel bag with the food inside and help themselves. They did not do too much damage, but it was just another thing that made me reconsider staying up here. Once I decided to stay, I put my food in a heavier duffel bag and covered the food and my other gear I left outside with a tarp and tried to seal it somewhat with rocks. It did work, but was a poor fix for the problem. The mice were determined to get at that food, but it took a full week to get a small hole started in the heavier duffel bag. I could have tried to hang it from a tree, but I did have over two and half weeks of food in the bag and it was heavy and I simply chose not to. Later when returning back to Kennedy Lake Resort, I told the owner of the pack station I got invaded by mice and he just looked at me funny. Then said, “I have never heard of that?” And I was thinking, “well now you have!”

With what I just described, most people would say, what is the big deal? There is always solutions and just deal with it and they would be right. But I was making the situation more difficult because I was relying on myself to do everything and to find the solutions to any problems I would face, and the fact that I was alone, and with a dog to take care of, and protect.

When someone is alone for the first time in the wilderness or even just alone there is a different dynamic in play. Everything is reliant on that one person and one cannot rely on another person for help or ideas in dealing with problems. You also find that you have more confidence that tends to play off of another person or when being with other people. You also have another person there if there is an emergency, or injury. It is really not that smart to do this alone. It can be very dangerous, and not recommended. But people still do it, like me! Although I have had backpacking experience, it was very different being alone. Instead of seeing those situations as challenges to overcome, I saw them as hindrances and frustrations. Once I changed my mind-set to the idea of enjoying the challenge of overcoming obstacles it helped me focus and face those challenges at hand with a sense of enjoyment, and confidence.

Being in the wilderness alone, one begins to appreciate the isolation that befalls on ones psyche. Not to long ago I began watching Les Stroud’s Survivorman, and when I was up in the wilderness alone, I really appreciated what he did for seven days in different environments he was not necessarily accustom too, or familiar with. With virtually very little in hand as far as survival gear and food to survive he did it alone. And of course on top of that he had to film it. In a survival situation whether simulating a situation or in a real situation, stamina is important, but if you don’t have the mental strength to deal with your situation, and challenges, panic can set in and you increase your chances of not surviving if you can’t calm your mind down. Being in a place that is unfamiliar, with no one else around and relying on your skills (what survival skills one may have), Mother Nature can be a very scary proposition. Every negative, as well as positive emotions come into play and one can be riding a roller-coaster of emotions that can take a grown man down, as described in Ed Wardles story that I will discuss later in this section.

When we started out on this trip on the first morning from Kennedy Meadows Resort I felt a little congested and thought it was just the altitude and chill in the air. Each day it progressively got worse and it had become a small concern for me. I was not sure what it was and being alone did not help matters. I would have to say, if I was with someone I probably would have just dealt with it, but being alone in the wilderness did cause me to be a bit concerned. Although my condition did not worsen much, it was still something I had to watch consider if it was to get worse, and being up at a high altitude also possibly having a factor – making breathing more difficult.

Each morning for the first couple of days here, I would be constantly dealing with a difficult task of getting a fire going because of wet wood until I remembered a very simple concept that I had forgotten. If you provide enough oxygen to a fire it will flame up in most instances unless everything is wet. I also learned later on other trips that once you have a hot fire going the previous night, it makes it much easier to get a fire going the next morning because some of the coals are usually still hot. Hot coals covered with ash will prolong the coals. One can use their hands to detect where the heat is coming from, and use that heat source to start a fire easily with dry tinder. Another thing I learned is if you have a fire going, put any wet or damp wood around the fire to dry it out. Those little things can make a big difference and make ones life much easier. When it seemed the fire was out or going out, I thought I would have to start the whole process over again. In fact, in most cases all I had to do is blow on the coals to get the fire going. It was an exciting moment when I recognized this simple and obvious technique and also an embarrassing one. Once I used this technique it was much easier to get the fires going and with far less work and frustration. Usually starting a fire in the evenings weren’t as difficult and the reason was, there were still hot coals in the fire. When building fires safety should always be on ones mind. Forest fires destroys life.

Since we are alone, I am always mindful of safety not doing thing carelessly or stupid. No matter how careful one is in the wilds, accidents can still happen, it can turn bad quickly or make the experience miserable. Even with another person or people, risk taking, especially stupid risk taking can turn very bad. We tend to feel invincible at times, but nature can be very unforgiving. Be smart while in the back country. Enjoy all she offer, but don’t be stupid. A lot of people go camping, and/or backpacking, and know little in what they are doing. I was one of them when I first started. Learning survival skills, good fire starting skills, and navigational skills will make ones experiences more enjoyable, and much safer.

In recent years backpacking has become very popular, and more dangerous with the majority of people not having any clue of what they are doing. Having good and reliable equipment, and quality clothing is important, but so is having the required knowledge is as well. Preventing injuries are very important.

Today was our first day really exploring some of the areas around camp. I found some thistle, goose berry plants (with no berries, too early) and willow in close proximity of camp. There was also lupine that covered portions of the meadow with it’s lavish violet flowers. Though most of the lupine species are not an edible plant and it can be poisonous to people, it provides incredible beauty, as with the many other alpine spring flowers to the meadow, and to the eye of the beholder. When we learn about the flora and fauna, in an area we spend time in, or in general, it opens up a whole new world of appreciation in our natural environment. It can bring a whole new awakening to our amazing planet.

We continued our walk to the base of the mountain on the east side where there were a grove of aspen. Just out from the tree line I found wild onion and inside the grove of aspen growing along downed aspen trees were an abundance of stinging nettle. I picked some stinging nettle to take back to camp for some tea later. It would be the first for having stinging nettle tea and I was courteous to try it. There were many plants in the grove of aspen I did not identify. I wanted to come back when I could to find other plant treasures within the aspen grove. Throughout the meadow there were an abundance of shooting star plants. The leaves and roots are edible on the shooting star, but I did not try them. I also found Indian paint brush in abundance up here and sampled a little bit of that, and took nibbles here and there when I came across these beautiful flowers. There are many species of the Indian paint brush with a slightly different taste to each one. The taste depends on the color of the flower. The lighter color, the better tasting. I was very pleased with what I had found and it was enough to keep me busy studying them and sampling some as a food source. I found some thistle next to camp and tried them with delight as a flavorful morsel for the first time. Not much there, but very tasty. It had an artichoke flavor with a crispy celery texture – lovely.

As far as animals, I did see a marmot on the first part of the trail coming up. He/she was perched on a rock. A beautiful critter.

At Kennedy Lake, there were the pesky mice, ground squirrel, gray tree squirrel and even a mallard duck. Mule deer (always does) usually came too visit in the meadow, and among the aspen groves to feed during early evening hours. Shiloh enjoyed chasing them, but could never come close to catching them. I think maybe, he was chasing them when they got to close to camp. Shiloh was very protective of our camp. Shiloh was about Six and a half years old.

When you are in the early learning stages of survival living, or bushcraft skills you unknowingly expect that all the wild edibles you have studied will be in abundance or at least in small quantities, so you can experience them through observing, eating, or using different plants and trees for making tools or for other uses. Certain rocks or animal bones are also a good find to practice tool making. And sometimes we foolishly think we will see an abundance of different animals in the area. But in most cases you only find some of those things while out in the wilderness, especially when only out for a short period. This is why being observant is very important in survival skills. And of course plants have seasons when they grow, when they are edible as with the plants with berries. Ripe berries are usually found in the later months of summer. But because of this, the whole process of observation and discovery becomes more exciting when you do find these treasures of nature. It opens up a window few ever experience. It gives a greater appreciation of what nature provides when observant. Every time I discovered a new plant, or see an animal, or discover new ways of using the natural resources that are at hand, it makes the experience being out in the natural world extremely exciting. At least for me it does. Your respect and appreciation also becomes heighten with a new awareness of the world around us – incredible. And once you begin to master these things such as plant identification, the world of the plant and the knowledge grows into the understanding of what plants can be used for in medicinal uses. Nature provides us with endless knowledge and resources we can use in our experiences in nature – magical. As in the other skills you may practice, even ones you think are simple, they can take time getting the materials, preparing the materials, and in making the skill(s) work. It teaches us patience. But once mastered it becomes second nature, and faster.

In the late afternoon we got a very light rain shower. It was very refreshing and beautiful.

I made some stinging nettle tea before dinner and I was amazed how good it tastes. That night Shiloh and I had chicken breast for dinner. We picked up enough firewood earlier for the night and the following morning. I felt a little congested that evening and thought I might be having a cold coming on. It was nice having dry firewood.

In reviewing my accomplishments of the day, I got the camp organized, reassembled the tent properly, found a pretty good source of firewood, and found many plants I could observe. I also found ground squirrel dens all around my camp. I would use those for practicing my snaring skills next week. I thought for tomorrow we will start the day with a good breakfast of bacon and eggs and a good cup or two of cowboy coffee; do a little more exploring, and maybe some reading. Today ended well. It was a very good day to be in the wilderness. I really think Shiloh is liking this life style of being a wilderness dog. We both had a very enjoyable day together. The companionship we are sharing with each other is indescribable, and special. We were the only ones here. Peace, and quiet in the wilderness.

June 11, 2009 – Thursday

Last night I had a miserable night coughing and dealing with congestion. This zapped my energy level for the day. I thought I would try looking for plantain plants. A plant with a lot of good medicinal qualities that may help me fight whatever I had. It is suppose to help with coughs and congestion when used in a tea form. It is also good to eat.

In the middle of the night I heard a noise that sounded like it was in the tent. I looked around and saw a little mouse scampering around on the screen doorway. Shiloh was sound to sleep. “Great watch dog!” I said to Shiloh who was still sound to sleep.

When we got up, I got the fire going. We had our breakfast, but I did not find it to appetizing because of how I felt. Shiloh enjoyed his portions very much.

I walked the whole valley meadow this morning looking for the plantain plant with no luck. I later found out, it did not grow in higher elevations above 6000 ft. So I tried the next best thing that I knew there was an abundance of, and that was the stinging nettle plant. The stinging nettle plant is full of vitamins and minerals, but it seemed it did nothing to help my ailments.

A large group of adults and young girls came into the meadow today – twenty-seven to be exact. I think it was a girl scouts troop and their stay was for three or four days. Some rode in with the pack animals and others hiked in. They stayed in a large camping area up stream and the west side, across the creek from our camp.

Three guys and two girls also came up on horseback and were staying at the log cabin. They had their gear packed in by Kennedy Meadows Pack Station. I thought this was a great idea. They were up here for three nights. They turned out to be pretty good neighbors and not to loud.

Seeing the horses got me thinking about my horses I had to sale or give away. I really miss my horses. I have been thinking about Shawnee quite a bit being up here as well. She would have loved it up here with Shiloh. One of the joys I had with the horses was horse camping and riding them in beautiful country. I truly felt total freedom with the horses. I use to dream of being in the country with the horses and having romantic picnics. I got to live that experience many times. Having horses was truly a gift. Incredible animals.

Today was not to productive, but then again I was not feeling that hot. It probably didn’t help doing a lot of walking in search of the elusive plantain plant. I was feeling a little better this afternoon and evening and hoping I would have a better night sleep. I did try some pine needle tea this afternoon. It wasn’t bad, it tasted like pine. It wasn’t very strong, it had a very light flavor to it. Pine tea is very high in vitamin C. I should have been guzzling it down I suppose, and then maybe it would have helped my congestion.

Last night we heard the chorus of howling coyotes and tonight spotted one across from our camp on the other side of the creek. We spotted some deer traveling across the meadow again in early evening and again Shiloh wanted to chase them for a bit until he realized they were just too fast for him.

We finished off the chicken for dinner and then turned in early. On this trip, I brought my Cabelas five person dome tent and not the one I used at Del Valle. I used an inflatable mattress as well. I did not feel we needed a large tent, and the tent was comfortable enough for the two of us, and for some gear. I didn’t bring bedding for Shiloh though. He has to sleep on the floor, but he is a dog and that is what dogs do. They can sleep anywhere, and Shiloh did. If he can lie in a cold, wet mud puddle, he can sleep on the floor of the tent.

June 12, 2009 – Friday

I slept a little better last night and once I got up and started moving around in the morning I was feeling better. I cooked up some bacon and eggs for me and Shiloh. My appetite has not been that good since I got here, but I was looking forward to a good breakfast this morning. The skies were overcast this morning with a little bit of the Sun peaking through. Occasionally a brisk alpine wind would blow through camp, a sign we were in the high country.

One thing I would do differently from this trip is bring a stove, paper plates, a bed for Shiloh, panniers to protect our food from critters getting into it, an ice chest, a better air mattress and paper towels. I am sure I will think about more things later.

I did bring a water filter on this trip for my drinking water and used it pretty consistently. I was told the water shouldn’t be a problem, but I did not want to take any chances and especially with staying here for a couple of weeks.

Some might think, what this guy is doing is not surviving in the wilderness and that person would be correct, I am not. I am learning, studying, observing, and practicing survival skills in comfort. Why be miserable? I want to enjoy the process while learning. If one tries to jump into a survival situation to learn and practice survival skills based strictly on books and videos without actually testing those skills in real life situations before hand, and without backup equipment and supplies, they will have an awakening that, that was a real stupid move. Many survival skills may look easy, but in actuality they take lots of practice, knowledge, and time, as well as mastery for them to work. Fire is a good example, fire is a big part of survival in many ways. 1) It is used for warmth and a sense of well being. 2) It helps keep the potentially danger critters away. 3) It is used for cooking or smoking. 4) It is used for making tools and may help in shelter building. 5) It provides light for doing work at night, and 6) you can use it for signaling for rescue if in a survival situation. There are also many techniques and tools used for fire starting and finding the right wood for the chore at hand is very helpful, and important. Knowing the different types of wood for the fire itself is also helpful as with the challenges I am facing with dealing with wet or damp wood. There are techniques and skills in dealing with all these things relating to fire making and they cannot be learned on a weekend trip into the mountains.

I forgot how long it takes to cook things at a higher elevations, even boiling water takes much longer. That always has to be considered.

As part of my survival gear, I brought a quart tin can and put a clothes hanger on the top for a handle. It can also be hung by using the hanger hook. I made it for cooking and boiling water and it works great. I learned about it’s use in a survival video and I use it every time I am in the backcountry. A very useful item to have for a survival trip. You can cook in it, boil water, get water and use it as a drinking cup. It can also be used in other ways such as a digging tool. The more uses an item has the better it is in a real survival situation and an item you want with you.

The clouds coming in show signs of possible rain coming our way.

This morning I made a few tools from the willow. A stirring stick and a stick with a notch cut into it at one end to use to lift my tin can from the fire as with using it for pouring. The willow has many uses for tools and weapons as well as helping if one is suffering from a headache. There is a lot of willow around.

I hate to admit it, but being alone in the wilderness began wearing on me, even with Shiloh being with me. It left me with a feeling of uncertainty and unease. The thoughts of the what if scenario played in my head with me being sick. Being alone can bring on many thoughts that you can only share with yourself when alone. There maybe thoughts that bring on fear or panic. It is you and you alone and the challenge can be overwhelming if things go wrong. There is no one to help you or support you. When you are with another person or a small group of friends, the fear factor may not even exist. You have that comfort level that you can rely on your friends for help or just for companionship and comfort. It brings a level of ease and a level of confidence. It can help in a survival situation or it can in fact make it worse. When you feel too comfortable or too confident in a situation, you may become careless and in a survival situation this could be deadly. You may take on more risk or you may not be as observant of your situation as you should be. One thing about being alone, you are more in tune with your surrounding and emotions. Maybe this feeling I am experiencing is because of this bug that I have.

I have noticed dreams becoming more vivid up in the wilderness.

This feeling of uneasiness I was experiencing with being alone was not only uncomfortable, it also felt like I was failing. I dreamed of doing this for a long time and the sense of disappointment was overwhelming to me. The thoughts of, am I really able to do this played in my mind. Why can’t I be at ease? These emotions I was feeling were just that feelings. I allowed them to take over my being and turn them into a subtle, but somewhat fearful and isolating experience. These feelings could happen to anyone, because we are dealing with experiences we have never experienced and that is a normal reaction. It is how we deal with it with another story. Accepting it for what it is, than letting it go. There was really no reason for me to feel this way except for maybe the upper respiratory problem I had. I had enough firewood and enough tools to get a fire going, I had enough food for the full two and half weeks and a little extra in an emergency and the weather was very comfortable. I just allowed my thoughts to get the upper hand of me. Watching the people having fun with their horses probably didn’t help either.

I have to add, Shiloh made it much easier to be up here alone. He loves to go camping and is a good companion, and I probably wouldn’t have done this without him. I know I wouldn’t have done it without him.

When alone or in a survival situation, one needs to keep busy otherwise those nasty thoughts may come creeping in, boredom may set-in and even panic. Staying busy keeps your mind focused and occupied. I had many things I wanted to get accomplished on this trip, so staying busy should not have been much of an issue for me, and I don’t think being sick really helped the situation much. I was concerned it may turn into something more serious. I think what was weighing on my mind as well, was the economy, and if I had any work to come back to.

I did not do much on this day because of how I was feeling. I was really drained. We just hung around camp, did a little reading and tried a little fishing in the creek. It began raining early afternoon off and on and became steady for the rest of the evening. It was a light rain and it was very pleasant. A beautiful rainbow appeared in the valley with the mountains in the background that made the whole scene of the valley picture perfect. It would have made a great photograph.

I fixed the tri-tip steak for dinner and shared it with Shiloh. We went to bed early.

Originally I wanted to try snaring some small critters, like ground squirrel, but because I had so much food, I really felt the need not to kill an animal, or even a fish was appropriate.

Ray Mear in his book, The Outdoor Survival Handbook, writes,

“As we move through the outdoors, an understanding of what is happening in the lives of the wild creature enables us to give them the space and respect they deserve.”

He also writes of spring time,

“A time of new life for both plant and animal communities, spring is heralded by the dawn song of blackbirds willing the sun into the sky. The countryside, stretches, yawns and slowly begins to unfurl. How great it is to be awake!”

In these words I also remembered, spring is a time for new life, and I did not want to interrupt this special time when the young rely on its parents for their survival. I did not want to risk taking a new life or anyone of their parents for the sake of practicing a survival skill if not absolutely necessary. When we practice such skills, we have to be respectful to nature, and be aware of the impact we make on the land.

July 13, 2009 – Saturday

It has been five days now. Last night was the best night sleep I have had since I got up here. I did have some strange dreams – reflections of my life. The first dream I recalled, I felt a sense of resolve with the promise it had shown. The others I felt unchanged, in turmoil, a place many find themselves in the later years of their life. The questions, could I have done more in my life, or did I make a difference on my stay on this planet? I have personally struggled with those questions.

For me, these questions are always on my mind. Questions about the environment and what the human species has done to it and continue to do to it. Human rights for indigenous people and the atrocities they have suffered through and continue to suffer through, constantly weighs on me. My purpose I felt I had discovered was to be a voice for the indigenous people of the world and the natural environment that provides us incredible beauty as well as providing us the environment that sustains life – all life. It has also become a driving force in my life.

In the first dream, I asked myself the questions, was what I was doing out here, what I really wanted as part of my life? Was this experiment living in the wilderness what I really wanted and could I even do it? The answer I received was absolutely. The second dream was looking into the future when I returned home. Questions like, will I have work when I get back? What will happen if I don’t? Is this living in the wilderness something I just think I want, is it just a romantic notion being and living in the wilderness or is it just some illusion thinking it will bring me greater peace and happiness in my life? Is it a character I am playing, thinking I could even become a naturalist? Do I really have what it takes mentally to live in the wilderness? And the final question in the dream was, what is the point of being up here, do people really care any more? I was lost in a swirling sea of confusion and uncertainty. And yet I felt an inner peace between all this doubt.

When I awoke, the second dream was still lingering in my mind. The beauty I experience each morning at Del Valle was just a blur out here. The magnificent beauty that surrounds us out here cannot be fully described and the comparison with Del Valle cannot be made. Yet I am feeling fear, loneliness and a lack of confidence. And with that uncertainty comes the concerns for Shiloh. Questions like, will he be okay up here? Will something happen to him where I won’t be able to help him in an emergency? The mind can truly ruin a great experience.

I suppose the loneliness may come from seeing others up here with friends, girl friends or family. You begin questioning yourself, why am I up here alone? Why am I not sharing this experience with another person? But I always wanted to see if I could do it alone. I wanted to have that sense of freedom of not having to rely on someone else to give me the comfort and self confidence that is needed to be alone in the wilderness. I thought nature itself would do that. And of course, I wanted to experience this with Shiloh.

The thought of being alone for many can be terrifying. They will choose to be in an abusive relationship or a dysfunctional relationship rather than be alone. It was for me when I was younger. But now it gives me a sense of freedom knowing that my feelings and being are not dictated by having to be with another person to enjoy myself and my life.

Today we woke up to blue skies and a light dusting of snow on the mountain peaks. While I was writing in my journal this morning, it is clouding up again and looks like a chance of rain. I am still congested and with a cough and find it to be more of an annoyance than feeling sick, but I have noticed that it has zapped my energy level quite a bit.

I didn’t do much today, some reading, gathered and chopped firewood. I suppose I was a little down today. Later in the day my neighbors from the cabin brought me two trout and I cooked them for dinner for me and Shiloh. I added a small amount of sage brush picked from close to camp and some diced onion that I had brought up with us. I cooked it over the coals in aluminum foil and they turned out perfect.

Shiloh and I visited with our neighbors who gave us the trout. They offered me some whisky, and I couldn’t refuse the offer. I had it straight and it went down very nicely.

Earlier in the day, the packers took the large group of girl scouts back to Kennedy Meadows and I ran over to one of the wranglers to ask if he could have someone send up some over the counter medicine and maybe some tea to try and rid what was effecting me.

The loneliness is still playing a factor in my well being up here. I need to focus on those things I came up here to do.

It showered a little this afternoon. Sometimes the rain is so light if feels refreshing and quite beautiful in the mountain setting. I just noticed blue camas I believe, next to our camp.

I started my fire using the fire stick or metal match, steel wool and juniper bark. There is not a lot of juniper up here, but it is around if you keep your eyes open. On the hike up here, there was a lot more juniper and occasionally we would see the Giant Sequoia.

For the past few days when the girl scouts group were camping here, I usually saw three guys carrying water containers to a spot across the meadow from our camp and towards the aspen grove. So today I wanted to see what they were doing at that spot. A big rock gave us a point of reference to where the location was. Shiloh and I took a walk to see why this spot had become a gathering point for those guys.

When we got there we found it was a spring that was modified with a catch basin and a hose. So we came back to fill some containers of water to try it out.

June 14, 2009 – Sunday

This morning I decided to leave. I was not getting any better. The opportunity was there when the horse packers came to pick up my neighbors things at the cabin. I told them to send someone out tomorrow to pick up our things. I was not sure when the next opportunity would be to be picked up. It might not be until next weekend so I thought it better to leave now while I was feeling okay, but I was still coughing and congested which has not subsided. It still had me a little concerned.

I noticed Shiloh was not feeling well either. Yesterday he was not very active and actually slept on my mat and sleeping bag in the tent most of the morning until I made him come out. I wasn’t crazy about him on my sleeping bag because he was filthy, but he was just looking at me through the tent door opening with this sad look on his face, so I just left him be for a while to rest comfortably. I was hoping he would be okay for our hike back.

The packers brought in some medicine for me and some tea, so I am hoping that will help. What service out in the wilderness. Who would have guessed? Room service in the wilderness.

I feel a little disappointed we have to leave, but also a sense of relief. I don’t want what I have to get any worse while I am up here. Staying up here for my planned two and half weeks would have been a real challenge for me mentally I think. But then I am not looking forward to going home to the usual stuff, especially if there is no work. I admit, it has been difficult being alone up here, but at the same time an incredible experience.

Today, my neighbors at the cabin are being replaced with two cowpokes who put up the fencing for the cattle that come up in July.

Shiloh seems to be feeling better. He got up to investigate a new dog that had come up with the cowboys and he is now laying in the meadow next to the cabin just watching the goings on of the new comers and maybe the new dog might want to play with him. Just watching him lying there, it felt like this was where he was suppose to be – a place of belonging, a place we called home.

I began packing everything up that I could and organized the gear for our departure on Monday.

June 15, 2009 – Monday

Shiloh and I got up early to take down the tent and finish packing the gear for the packers. I asked the cowboys at the cabin if I could use there fire to brew some coffee. We talked a little about what they were doing up here and how long they were staying.

At about 9:30 am Shiloh and I headed on the trail for our hike home. I was feeling pretty good and Shiloh seemed like he was ready for the hike. It was a love /hate experience leaving Kennedy Lake. We met the packers coming in while we were going out.

We took our time hiking back, stopping to observe the things we missed coming up and stopping to talk with fellow hikers. It was a nice day and a very relaxing and enjoyable hike until the last couple of miles. We reached the rocky areas of the trail on our decent where it had high stepping stones we had to walk down and it was joint jarring for the lower body, and exhausting. At the bottom portion of the trail we hit sand we had to walk in and at that point I was getting very tired with joints aching and my feet sore. I realized it is harder on the feet, legs and joints going down hill then it is going up.

We made it back to Kennedy Meadows Resort in about 4 hours, I stopped at the restaurant for a cheese burger, and a couple of cold, refreshing beers. I ate outside on the veranda so I could be close to Shiloh.

After lunch, I got us checked-in and went to our small one room cabin, I got cleaned up, we rested for a time then picked up our gear from the loading dock. Got the stuff loaded on the truck and took it to the cabin to unload. We took a short walk and then had some dinner. I may have also had a few more beers possibly.

June 16, 2009 – Tuesday

We stayed to have some breakfast at the restaurant before the long drive home. Though we didn’t stay for the two and half weeks that I had planned, we did do it for seven days alone in the wilderness.

The plan to do another trip in September of this year is still on my mind. Originally I was going to go for a month, but may have to re-evaluate that prospect. Maybe I will try two weeks. Though somewhat disappointed on how this trip turned out, it was not a complete loss or waste of time. I did practice some fire starting skills, made some very basic utensils from willow, learned some of the species of edible plants and made a list of items I should have brought with me on this trip for our next trip out. I also tried stinging nettle tea and pine tea and learned a little about myself being alone in the wilderness.

Was I disappointed in the outcome of my trip? Yes, a little. I was hoping to study more of the edible plants while I was there, work on more survival skills and I did not feel as comfortable being alone in the wilderness as I thought I would. It could have been the concern I had with my upper respiratory system or a high expectation that I would be able to achieve the survival skills easily or both. I did take back with me more of an appreciation for the wilderness and some lessons well learned about myself and from nature and once I returned home, I was ready to go back into the wilderness. And for Shiloh, he was a great companion, and I would choose him to go with me over anyone else. For me, I feel we have developed an even stronger bond with each other, and a connection that will never be broken.

One of the pitfalls of being able to survive in the wilderness besides shear panic, is loneliness and boredom that can drag someone down quickly. That is to say, as long as you have enough food and water to get you through and a good shelter. Even if you had all those thing, loneliness, and fear can break a person. Keeping ones mind and body active is critical in surviving in the wilderness. Once boredom sets in, you begin questioning yourself. I began falling into this on our June trip at Kennedy Lake, not from boredom, but from frustration and uncertainty, and being under the weather.

There is so much we can do in nature once we learn how to do it, and having the motivation to do it. Just the observation of nature can bring one to a peaceful state of mind. But because we are use to a fast pace world constantly keeping the mind active on all the things we must and need to do, we never really have much time just to relax and smell the roses. And if we are able to relax some, we are usually off again in a short time doing something else, even if it is watching TV or on the computer. Most of these activity does not give us any peace of mind. We are never able to really experience quiet time. And when we have it, we don’t know what to do with it, or we get bored doing nothing, because there has to be more. And there is more. We just have to see thing from a different place from what we are use to. Maybe that is why so few people can meditate. In a survival situation, you are always aware of things, observing things and exploring your surroundings, and if not, you should be. You are collecting edible and setting traps, going hunting or fishing, gathering firewood and making tools. You might be problem solving or building a shelter or making a shelter better. If you are able to be at peace with the natural environment, you can enjoy and experience all the beauty that is all around you. I think if you put a group of average people together for a week in the wilderness with nothing to occupy their minds, they would become bored very quickly after a few days.

My experiences with frustration and expectations on survival tasks such as starting a fire, I think has been ingrained in our way of thinking by our society with the concept of the quick fix, getting thing done quickly or expecting things to happen quickly. Learning a new skill always takes a certain amount of time to perfect or master, but most of us want it too happen now and have the expectation that we can do it quickly especially when we think in our minds that it should not take long to learn or being that difficult of a task. Everything I am learning, from plant identification, to learning basic botany, biology and ecology, to animal identification, to the whole gamut of knowledge and skills required in the learning of primitive bushcraft skills can be mind boggling, and yet these basic skills become very simple in most cases when mastered, because we have been doing them for tens of thousands of years.

A good example of this is, starting a fire with a fire bow. The process is not a quick process. You first must look for and find the right materials for the fire bow, then putting everything together for it to work. You must get the right materials for a tinder bundle, collect the wood require to get the fire going and keep it going once you have flame. And the process of getting the amber required using this ancient method of fire by friction may take a long time. Les Stroud in one of his shows actually took him eleven hours to get an amber from using the fire bow and he had mastered that skill and still had problems. As with many bushcraft skills it takes time to learn and one needs not only the knowledge of how to do the skill, but also have the perseverance to learn and master the skill. There are usually no quick fixes in the wilderness.

Once I got home the upper respiratory condition lasted another three weeks.

In 2009, Ed Wardle, an adventurer and cameraman took a three month journey into the Yukon Wilderness alone. It was a life long dream of his being able to survive in the wilderness. He set off on his journey on July 3^rd. (only a couple of weeks after Shiloh and I left for our two and half week trip into the wilderness). He brought with him all the necessary equipment he would need including two rifles for protection, hunting and fishing gear and a canoe to survive in the wilderness. He did bring food, but only a limited amount that he would soon have to start rationing. He had hoped to live off the land by gathering wild edibles and killing wild game for his three month long stay. He would also film his experiences. You can see his documentary on Youtube, “Alone In The Wild.”

His first day in the wilderness, the isolation and reality of being alone in the vast wilderness was now real and setting in while he was watching the plane fly away into the distance. He was immediately facing uncontrollable feelings of uncertainty about this journey. An overwhelming feeling of anxiety filled his being. There was no other person around for hundreds of miles except for thick impenetrable bush, bears (both grizzly and black bear), moose, and the other animals that inhabited the area.

Because of hunting laws, he was not allowed to hunt large game. Though hunting laws are important, it makes living in the bush very difficult if you can’t shoot a variety of game. One has to live an opportunistic life style in the bush and needs to take every advantage when possible for sustenance. The mistake many make in thinking it would be easy to survive in the wilderness if they had the right equipment, such as rifles and fishing equipment is that, one does not always catch fish when fishing, and though there may be a lot of game in the area, one has to be able to find that game which is not always easy as with competing with other animals for that food source, even for the seasoned hunter. It is not like turning every corner and finding game for food. Another factor is being able to get to that animal for the kill. You may see a moose, but if it is crossing a lake you wouldn’t be able to shoot it or glassing an animal that may be a mile or two away, and by the time you reach it, it could be long gone, or the terrain may not be accessible to reach the animal. You may have to survive off small game such a mice or squirrel which is usually what ends up on the dinner plate with some wild edibles.

Ed Wardle experienced extreme ups and downs in his emotions, from being in awe of his surrounding, focusing on what he had to do to survive, to weeping uncontrollably, to anger, frustration, loneliness, and fear. He constantly had to deal with food deprivation and lack of energy due to the inadequate nutrients he was getting and needed to survive. He needed the essential fats and proteins that gives one the required nutrients for maintaining the necessary energy levels required. In his situation, he was probably burning 5,000 to 7,000 calories per day depending on his work level. And in a survival situation, one needs to work to survive, both on a physical level and to maintain a healthy emotional level. Usually when people find themselves with the reality of being in a survival situation, one of the first things they think about is of course being found, but the other is, food then water. And this decision making most likely will lead to not surviving.

On his 30^th day, he was still enjoying the experience of being out in the wilderness although it was rough going in every respect. He would move to different locations depending on what foods were available, thinking it would be better over there, but soon finding it was not, and was actually worse, making it even more difficult to find food. It is the greener on the other side syndrome. After the 30 days, it seemed like everything started to go down hill for him. He was having problems getting enough food to sustain himself and it was showing in his energy level and the ability to function mentally and physically. On the 44^th day, he was beginning to lose it. The loneliness, hunger, fear, and isolation began taking a tremendous toll on him mentally. Fear began to set in where it was difficult for him to focus, and survive. On day 50 he called in to be rescued.

His film is called, “Alone in the Wild” and is worth watching for those interested in living in the wilderness or being in the wilderness for an extended amount of time. I have to give this guy a lot of credit for doing this. Very few people would or could do what he did.

I can relate to a little of what he was experiencing. For most of us, being in the wilderness, although it may be incredibly beautiful, and so much to see and experience, it could be very difficult to do. Even if you had all the equipment you would need and were an expert in survival skills. Some people can be alone for a long period of time in the wilderness, most can’t. One of my cousins did it for four months in the dead of winter with only a knife and fire starting tool. I thought I could and it began effecting me the second day of being alone in the wilderness. And I had a dog! For me it began with expecting too much and getting frustrated to easily. I was also sick.

I would love to test myself to see how long I could do it for, but I am not sure if I would try it for three months although it would be great if I could. What I would be afraid of is it impacting me so much I would not want to go out into the wilderness again alone or with others. We can always take away valuable learning experiences from experiences that were not very pleasant at times. This is how we learn, and grow. This is how we become stronger human beings by learning from our mistakes.

On my first trip being alone in the wilderness experience, I was going to do it for two and half weeks and only made it for one week. But I did want to go back because I felt I had to take care of unfinished business. Though in the back of my mind I had hesitation on whether I could do it or not. I did realize we all need people, even me. I thought I would be fine without people for a long period of time. I learned they can be a welcome sight at times.

I do believe one really has to be involved, staying busy doing things and keep a calm perspective on things and enjoying every moment of the process. Learning survival skills is not easy and there will be many frustrations experienced, you just have to learn to move beyond those frustrations and realize it is part of learning. You also have to become connected with nature and have the feeling of belonging there, having a deep connection with nature. Easier said then done when alone.

One also has to understand that hunger can change how one responds to his environment and situation. As with Ed Wardle, his physical health was declining as with his mental faculty and that could have been the end of him if he found himself in an emergency situation. Many factors play into surviving and this is why it can be so difficult.

Another guy who deserves credit is Les Stroud of Survivorman. Les Stroud goes into harsh and remote environments, in very extreme conditions, in harsh deserts, thick tropical rain forests, stark polar regions, mountain ranges, boreal forests, lush tropical islands and even out to sea in a raft for seven days, alone with very little survival gear, no food and he has to film it all himself. Though he has a support crew relatively close to him, he still does it alone, in many conditions and environments that are new to him. And with minimal gear and food. I would like to see how many others could do this? He and his wife even spent a year in the bush on their honeymoon with very little to survive with.

I respect anyone who can be alone in the wilderness, and for those who truly respect nature.

In July, Shiloh and I took two – week long trips to public campgrounds along Hwy. 108 just to be back in nature and to learn more about edible plants. Nature had me in her grip and I wanted more.

When we got home, work was still slow, so I got done the little work I had and we headed back into the mountains.

Our Journey Into The Wilderness

Camping at Del Valle Campground – Continues

Part 3

CAMPING AT DEL VALLE REGIONAL PARK

April 3, 2009 – Day 3 – Friday

I slept pretty well on our second night out with the exception of our neighboring campers staying up late talking. The morning was cool, but pleasant. Shiloh and I took our morning walk around camp and visited our friends, the horses. They remembered us and came to greet our arrival. They aren’t showing the hesitation they exhibited when they first saw Shiloh on the first and second day. This would become our daily ritual for the first two weeks stay at this campsite, and then we will be moving to another campsite for two weeks in a different camping area within the main campground and we would be further away from the horses.

For breakfast, I put some coffee on and cooked up some bacon and eggs for Shiloh and I. It was a good breakfast, where food always seems to taste better while camping.

I was noticing some of the birds in the area and there were a number of yellow-bill magpies, crows, scrub jays, acorn woodpeckers, and doves, along with other species of smaller birds such as the dark-eyed junco. The yellow-bill magpies seems to be the hierarchy of all the birds (from my observation) in the area except for the predatory birds, and pushes all the other birds away when there are good food pick-in’s around the campsites. The magpies are a very beautiful bird and very interesting to watch as are the crows, and jays. They seem to show more of a personality than most birds.

The wild turkeys were gobbling from a distance in the oak covered hillside. Throughout our stay, we never actually saw any turkeys that I thought to be unusual. There is a large population of wild turkey in the whole Tri-Valley foothills, stretching from north to south for many miles. And for many people the turkey is becoming a big nuisance.

As for the magpies, crows, and scrub jays, they are always looking for an easy hand out, or for any opportunity to grab any tidbits unsuspecting campers have left on the picnic table or lying around. They are the scavengers of the campgrounds. If you don’t eat it, they would be happy to take it off your hands.

Our campsite was #131 in Camp Site Area D. It is relatively small, but large enough for one person and his big dog. It is one of the nicer campsites in Area D. Before camping here, I had come to Del Valle to check out all the campsites to see which ones were the nicest and would worked best for Shiloh and I. I then put together a list of potential campsites we liked, and I then made the reservations. I was lucky to get this one. It had a good flat area for the tent with a half decent separation between each campsite. It provided a little more privacy compared to the other campsites. Our site also provides us with sun and shade, as with some tree protection from the northerly winds.

I was originally going to try and stay for two months at Del Valle, but soon realized one month is more than enough considering the amount of people and the types of people who visit the park. There are many campers that come for the weekend, many to just party, and to be loud and obnoxious. We have become a society where we go into nature to get drunk, and to be disrespectful of other campers and to nature. Many ignore the 10:00 PM “Quiet Time.” Some will go on being a big disturbance till 3:00 AM. I always get my blood streaming with people like that.

Shiloh has been exceptionally good staying in camp and not wondering off to far from our campsite. He finds a comfortable spot to lay where he has a clear view of the area, and he is always looking, listening and smelling all the new things around him. He finds all the ground squirrels running around very interesting. Shiloh would be typically napping at home during the day, but with his new surroundings, there is way too much to stimulate his senses. I think he is enjoying this experience as much as I am.

The skies were clear on this day, with a nice cool breeze blowing through camp. We planned on staying around the lake for the day and just enjoy the sights, and sounds of the oak studded foothills and valley.

Though the weather for the month of April was usually cool, there was no real need for a campfire. But what would camping be without a small fire to warm the soul.

Being that the day was Friday I was anticipate a lot of campers coming in for the weekend. I was not really looking forward to the crowds and noise.

Today we met Kevin, our next door neighbor, and he seems to be a nice enough guy. He told me he comes up to Del Valle quite often for a little R & R from his business as a swimming pool maintenance guy from across the San Francisco bay. I did find him very inquisitive, and asking very interesting questions. He would ask me the same question two or three times seeing if I would give him a different answer. He asked me if I was Gay (homosexual), guessing because I told him I have never been married, and if I was homeless, probably because I told him I was staying here for a month. Both questions I replied with a “No.”

The night before, Kevin told me he had a visiting camper he met earlier, who joined him for dinner. Kevin told me his new found friend was homeless. He invited me and Shiloh over for dinner, but I declined, because I had food I needed to eat before it went bad. I am sure Shiloh would not have had a problem seeing what the neighbor had to offer for any left over scraps. When ever meat is involved, Shiloh is always happy to help out obligingly in eating whatever is offered. He doesn’t like wasting a good piece of meat if he can help it.

Shiloh and I just stayed around camp in the early part of the day and then headed to town for firewood and some groceries. It was late afternoon when we returned back to camp, unloaded our supplies and headed for the lake for a nice walk. That portion of the lake trail which is on the east side, and dogs are allowed off leash, so I let Shiloh off leash.

On our lake walk the day before, we saw a blue heron, coots, male and female mallard ducks and some killdeers. As soon as we reached the lake where there was easy access to the lake shoreline from the trail, Shiloh was in the water, biting at the water and splashing around having a good old time, and then once out of the water he would have this burst of energy and he would start running all around like something just bit him in the behind. He was hilarious to watch and I enjoyed the thought of him having so much fun. This is what it is all about. Shiloh wouldn’t swim, but loved playing in the shallows of the shoreline.

Further up the trail there is a large open area next to the lake they use for group camping, this has been our turn around point of our walk for most of our day walks. I let Shiloh play in the water some and I just observe what new things I can see, before we head back. And occasionally I will throw sticks to him to fetch or he would find his own stick to play with. When no one is around, the lake is a very peaceful, and beautiful place to enjoy the quiet and solitude of nature. I look forward to spending a lot of time in this peaceful place with Shiloh. It is a magical place and even more so with Shiloh with me.

The winds had calmed down for the day, yet it felt colder in the evening. The winds picked up becoming stronger, and was really blowing through the night.

We had to be ready for an early start the next day for spring shots for my last horse, Joey. Because of the bad economy, I was forced to sell all my horses but for Joey. Joey hadn’t been ridden since I got him about two years ago, so I focused on selling the horses I knew would sell first. I had a total of five horses. Two horses I gave away and two I sold dirt cheap to pay for back boarding rent. One of the horses I gave away was Lacy. She was my first horse I had owned and she was the most challenging. But she was a great horse and I learned a lot about horses from her. She had taught me well in patience. I had her for eleven years. She was the most difficult to lose. We had a deep bond. I had many great and fun rides with her although she was very head strong. She was known to everyone who knew her as Crazy Lacy because she had a mind of her own. Some people thought she was a dangerous horse, but she really wasn’t. Though she would fight me occasionally, she had a loving heart for people and she attached herself to other horses as a protective mother would be to her child. The first six months I had her she constantly fought me, but when I moved her to a different environment she had totally changed from fighting me to working with me. She definitely was not the best trained horse and not the best horse for some people. I had to work with her a lot, and the more I rode her, the better she became, but she had her own spirit and showed it occasionally. When a female was on her back, Lacy had more of a trust. It took me some time to get that trust with her.

About a year ago, we did the Poker Ride at Del Valle, I brought Lacy with me. There were a lot of horses with lots of energy and a lot of commotion going on with all the horses. Lacy was the perfect lady. She would usually get wound up with the other horses. We rode with a group of friends, about seven of us all told and the ride began very relaxed. Lacy was in the lead and she preferred it that way. We were one of the slower groups, and riders and horses began passing us by. More and more groups of riders were asking to go by and then Lacy began acting up a little because she wanted to catch up to those horses that had just passed us and that got all the other horses in our group excited.

Just to give a little background on our riding experiences, Lacy Girl was a Missouri Foxtrotter with a very fast walk. She could walk as fast as many other horses could trot and even pass them with ease at even a faster walk. She had three speeds in her walking gait. And it was as smooth as glass. She also liked being in the lead which can cause a few problems. We were only able to ride with certain riders and with certain horses which was also a problem at times.

Usually Lacy got the blame for getting other peoples horses all excited and I sensed this was happening on this ride, so I asked the group I was in if I could ride ahead? And of course they were more than happy to say yes to my suggestion. And it was fine with me.

Ever since I have had Lacy, I have always wanted to just let her loose and I would just joy the ride. And finally I had my chance. I of course had to be considerate of other riders, because this was not a race type of event. Every time we met up with other riders we would ask to pass and then I would just let Lacy go after we got a distance away from the other horses so as not to get them all riled up. It was like a joy ride for Lacy and I. The whole ride we cantered, did a little running and much of the time she did her incredible smooth and fast walk. It was a great ride with her. When we were almost to the end of our ride, Lacy began slowing down, then stopped and looked back. I was just observing her. She would do this to determine where the other horses were that she had past. She would always do this if we got too far ahead of the other riders. Once she heard the horses, she would then continue on. I would always let her do this because it was always amazing to me that she was always concerned with the other horses (her herd), behind us. Once she knew where the horses were on our ride we just slowly walked to the starting point of the ride. I had realized we had past every single group of horses in this event that had past us (which were quite a few) in the beginning of the ride. She was once again the lead horse. Others who had the chance to ride Lacy (all women), understood her spirit.

I have had many incredible rides with Lacy, but by far this was the best, because it was just me and her.

Having horses and being able to have incredible experiences with them was truly a wonderful gift in my life. Of the many life changing experiences I have had, having horses was one of the best.

Losing my horses was a difficult time for me. And in 2007 I had lost Shawnee, my other dog. She was only four. That event was extremely difficult for me, and I am sure Shiloh missed her as well. They both loved each other and I was concerned how Shiloh would take her loss. I was never able to really tell if he was depressed or not that she was not around. I was very fortunate to have Shiloh during that difficult time. He eased the pain I was feeling for the loss of Shawnee and I was able to focus on our bond strengthening with each other. From that point on, he never really left my side. We were two peas in a pod.

April 4, 2009 – Day 4 – Saturday

Shiloh and I got up at 6:30 am, took our walk to see the horses and then left for the ranch where I had Joey boarded.

It was the coolest day so far with everything covered in frost this morning.

It was good to see little Joey. Joey is a black and white Missouri Foxtrotter. I left Shiloh in the truck so he wouldn’t chase or scare the horses and I went back into the back pasture to get Joey. It was no trouble getting him. I walk up to where he was standing, put the halter on him and walked him out. He was a good boy.

Though I did not spend very much time with Joey compared to the other horses, he had a very sweet temperament and I am sorry I did not give him more attention. It was not that I totally ignored him, but I could have given him more attention.

At a later date the lady who took Lacy asked me if they could take care of Joey for me and at the same time she would look for an appropriate buyer for him. I had a friend work with him occasionally at the stables ,and he was responding well with her. I had one guy look at him for his wife when I still had him and he rode Joey while his wife watched. At first I thought he may have been a good rider until he almost ran Joey and himself into a fence. I sensed Joey really did not like men riding him. When the lady took Joey back to her ranch, she couldn’t wait to ride him so before they reached their place they stopped at an area where she could ride Joey and hopped on him bare back. She said Joey was great. That was a big relief. Eventually she was able to sell Joey for me. She was a wonderful lady and you could tell she loved horses – she loved all animals. She had a warm heart with horses and the horses seemed to know this. I was grateful she was the one who got Lacy.

After the shots clinic we headed over to my friends house where we would be staying to get my computer running so I could do some contracts for new jobs.

When we were going back to Del Valle, Shiloh got sick and threw up on himself and in the truck. We skipped our walk to the lake, so Shiloh could rest and take it easy in camp.

A group of campers came in late afternoon on Friday and took the campsite next to Kevin. I believe their nationality was Ukrainian. They were loud and obnoxious all night and into the early morning. They were not prepared for the winds that night and woke with collapsed tents. Kevin said his camper was rocking every which way. Our tent stood firm in the wind.

Kevin was not happy nor was I with their loud noise so late in the night. They did apologize to Kevin and gave him some homemade Ukrainian style jerky. That helped ease the anger. They gave me some jerky as well and apologized to me.

It is unfortunate there can’t be that respect for others when in this environment, because this environment brings those who want to just enjoy the simplicity of nature. Then there are those who just sees this place as just another place to party and getting high or drunk. It seems it is not about being in nature and experiencing the beautiful surroundings this place offers to us. Most people unfortunately have become totally disconnected with nature in our modern society, and unappreciative of her, and all she brings to us. But I also give the Ukrainian’s credit for apologizing, most people wouldn’t care or make the effort. I talked with them when they were leaving on Sunday and they were really nice people, but still, it can ruin a persons experience when wanting to just take it easy. I suppose if people just followed the “Quiet Time” rules, It would not really be an issue.

On the weekend, the campsites were about a third full and it was much quieter than I had expected.

Kevin and his noisy neighbors (who I found out later were actually Bosnian) made friends and they shared some of their homemade Bosnian jerky with Kevin. Kevin then shared half the delicious jerky with Shiloh and I. All three of us thought it was excellent jerky – the best I have ever had. It seems it is better to make friends rather than enemies.

I have a tendency of getting irritated by people who seem to have no respect for other people. But then again, people will be people and I am sure they don’t do it intentionally, they just are out to have a little fun. Maybe I need to lighten up a little a bit.

While we went for a short evening walk around camp, I was looking at the array of spring flowers and noticed a very interesting plant. It may have been a flower, but the flower or leaves were saucer shaped. Not sure what kind of plant it was.

April 5, 2009 – Day 5 – Sunday

I slept pretty well for the night. About mid-night the winds began to howl like a pack of wolves and never stopped until about 9:00 am. We got up at 8:00 am with the wind still blowing strong. Our tent stood firm in the gale force winds though other campers did not fair so well with theirs. It doesn’t take too much to collapse a tent if it is not tied down properly. Shiloh did not have a lot of energy the day prior and seems he is doing better on this morning. We went to visit with Kevin at his camp, had a cup of coffee with him and Kevin shared a dog treat for Shiloh. Shiloh liked Kevin.

We went on our morning walk to see the horses, but they were too far away and had no mind to take the energy to come see us. The winds were calm now with just a nice cool gentle breeze and a clear sunny day. We had planned to spend the day at the lake for some exercise, some observing and for Shiloh to take a splash in the lake. I was hoping maybe it would take some of the throw-up smell off of him or at least cover it up with the lake smell.

Some of the birds we have seen are the yellow-billed magpies, scrub jays, crows, acorn wood- peckers, quail, dove, red-winged black birds and Turkey vultures, but no red-tailed hawks. I was told osprey, golden eagles and bald eagles have visited here. A bald eagles nest can be seen from across the lake on the west side.

On our lake walk, we ventured further then usual and we spotted a bobcat. First time I have seen one in the wild. It was pretty exciting. He or she was just walking on the trail checking things out as we were. I quickly put the lease on Shiloh, so he wouldn’t go after it. We also saw a turtle by the lakeside.

There are many species of birds, raptors, and mammals that reside here, or with the birds, a stopping ground during migration.

Almost near the end of our walk of the lake trail from our return point for our walk back, I looked up into the sky and saw a number of turkey vultures circling high in the sky and with them was a crow flying with them. Everywhere they moved, the crow followed. Never saw anything like it before. It is nice just to watch, and listen to nature in such a beautiful area we find ourselves in.

On our return back to camp from the lake we found most of the campers had left. They left as fast as they came – like a storm passing through for a short visit – we would have peace and quiet for five days. The lake transforms itself from a bustling activity of people on the weekend to a quiet and peaceful place of solitude during the week. An incredibly beautiful place when there are no people around.

I would have to say, most of the campers that come for the outdoors experience to camp, are not really for reconnecting with nature. It is more about being with friends or family, or partying. Unfortunately for them, I would guess they have missed 99% of the beauty that exists around them.

I was also surprised and dismayed on our return to camp, the homeless guy that was hanging out with Kevin the night before moved up to our camping area. He was in a campsite right across from us. I just hope he doesn’t decide he wants to start hanging out with us. It is not that I don’t want to be sociable, but I don’t. I came here just to hang out with Shiloh, and enjoy nature alone. I am not really crazy about the music he is playing either. He had a camper shell on his truck, where he called home.

The whole day was warm and beautiful. The drive to and from the lake from town is spectacular – the green meadows, the sycamore tree lined roadway, the valleys, the oak trees scattered throughout the hillsides giving the eye a visual treat too incredible for words. Seeing the old farm houses and ranches dotting the hillsides and valley floor brings one back to what the past must have been like here. The further you travel on this country road named, Mines Road, the further it takes you away from civilization and into this vast emptiness of the rugged untouched landscape, so different from the softness of the oak studded rolling foothills.

In a few areas close to the lake you see some scattered homes somewhat modern compared to the old farm houses and ranches in the area. It is a shame they built these homes with little attention to any architectural style or blending with the surrounding landscape of the country side. They are just rectangle boxes standing erect on the hillsides. Maybe it is the architectural background I have, it is something I quickly notice, when I pass by homes. Even some nice landscaping can add a lot to the home.

It is sad that that our society has, for the most part, no interest in reconnecting to this magical place we call Nature. This region is a treasure trove of biodiversity that can offer the Nature lover hours of enjoyment over and over again. Many who come to visit I would have to say probably feels no real connection when they come visit. nor want to. I am sure they come for the beautiful landscape, but it becomes just a backdrop that is rarely looked at or experienced on a deeper level. It become just a nice place to go out of the city for. It is just a park which is defined as a green area for recreation, which has many definitions in the use of the park. The least use is the experience of deeply experience all that it offers as far as Nature goes.

Litter is found everywhere, especially around the lake. The park provides trash cans, but for many it is too much of an effort to carry their garbage a short distance to dispose of the trash properly. So they leave it for everyone else to see, and wildlife to be impacted by. There is no excuse for litter in the campgrounds, because large dumpsters are provided, but again some just don’t care.

After dinner, Shiloh wanted to check out some squirrels at the same time a park police car was cruising the area. And of course he stopped because Shiloh was off lease. Beside the homeless guy, we were the only ones in the camping area, and of course the police officer had to make a big deal about it. He proceeded to question me as if I was a possible wanted felon. It wasn’t about the dog being off lease more than it was to check up on me. I felt it being almost a fine line towards harassment and I was pretty put out by this whole situation, but I kept quiet because he could have easily given me a ticket for Shiloh not having a dog license or being off leash.

He asked me about an incident back in 2001 where my name showed up on his little hand held computer. I was surprised about this because I did not have a clue of what could have happened relating to the East Bay Regional Park Police and the Regional Park system back then. He wouldn’t tell me what it was for or about, and he expected me to remember something that happened eight years ago. I thought he was going to handcuff me on charges of me being in their records, for me not remembering what it was about and for Shiloh being off lease. “I asked him what it said,” and he responded by telling me “it didn’t say why my name came up.” Maybe he was lying, maybe it was a test. He definitely was not Mr. Personality and seemed he had issues dealing with people in a respectful way. I was trying to figure out where he was going with this lame reason to question me. I was not a happy camper about this whole situation.

Because my dog was off leash, the police officer had to call on his hand held computer to find out if I was a wanted criminal or worse, a homeless person? He also asked me, what I was doing camping? “Are you here for business or pleasure sir?” “What the heck do you think I am here for, I thought? I am camping!” Couldn’t he just say, please keep your dog on the leash and enjoy your stay at the park? There is no excuse for a police officer to treat anyone like this.

After the incident with the police officer, I took Shiloh for a walk (off leash) to see the horses, thinking the police officer was probably spying on us.

Before calling it a night I wanted to do some writing in my journal. While I was writing this very material in my journal, I noticed Shiloh was gone. It was dark and he was off leash. I called him and while looking around for him I saw this sheepish figure appearing from the darkness of the vegetation next to camp with head down coming towards me. And then, I got a whiff of a very unpleasant odor in the same vicinity of Shiloh and it wasn’t a pretty sight, or smell. He got sprayed by a skunk.

I told him, “He was sleeping outside.”

It looked like or should I say, it smelled like he was only grazed by the spray around his head. The smell was bad, but not that bad and I allowed him to sleep in the tent with me. Probably not a smart move on my part, but I felt it would be better for Shiloh to sleep in the tent. just in case another skunk came by. I am not sure if Shiloh would have liked it being alone outside either.

April 6, 2009 – Day 6 – Monday

We got up around 7:00 am and the weather was cool and clear. The night was surprisingly not too bad with the slight scent of skunk lying next to me. The fresh scent of skunk smells different than what we are use to when smelling a road kill. When Shiloh got sprayed, he was foaming at the mouth and looked miserable. I was hoping this experience would teach him a lesson, but I soon found I was wrong. A friend of mine told me dogs don’t learn from the experience and will continue to chase skunks. When I heard that, I kept a close watch over Shiloh and around our camp.

Shiloh slept quietly, not bothered by his bad smell.

The first thing on the list of things to do for this morning after coffee and breakfast was to take Shiloh to the lake for a rinse and maybe he could get some of the smell off of him. The odor was not that bad and I was not really in a very good position to try any remedies to rid this newly acquired scent of his. I was curious to see how long it would take for it to wear off by doing nothing. For those inquiring minds, it took about 10 days for the smell to completely dissipate.

Our camping area had only three campers remaining from the past weekend. It means, we will have peace and quiet for a few days,

On our lakeside walk at the gate entrance to the lake trail, there was a female police officer by the gate and I was thinking, “Am I going to get harassed by her?” I ended up talking with her and she was very nice and pleasant. Isn’t that how police officers should be? Instead of, “Your papers please – show me your papers please.”

While on our walk along the lake I noticed the lush grasses on the foothills were beginning to change from their vibrant winter green to their shades of summer brown or what Californians prefer to call it, golden brown. But it indeed does have nice golden tones to them. Seeing grasses with an appreciation of what they add to a landscape, as an Artist would see them in a painting, gives us more of a greater beauty, and connection to nature. It gives a greater awareness in all things in nature.

The magpies are squawking as usual this morning, waiting to find any tidbits on the picnic tables, or the ground that campers have left behind. They also check out Shiloh’s food bowl and sneak a nibble or two when Shiloh isn’t looking. Shiloh is laying down keeping a close eye out for any sign or movement of ground Squirrels. It seems he is not to interested in the birds. He is more interested in ground squirrels than the magpies stealing his food. The ground squirrels seem to be very abundant and active this time of year.

Last night I was talking with the homeless guy camping across from us, camping in his camper. He goes by the initials LJ. and is from his home state of Arkansas. He was talking about being bored with nothing to do. LJ is a welder by trade and just lost his job. His current home is living in his camper. He is here because it seems the most likely place to stay when one is homeless, rather than sleeping on city park benches with a newspaper blanket, or in card board boxes in a vacant lot or alley ways, in recessed doorways or under freeways, or parked on city streets, or in parking lots. Campgrounds, when one can afford them is a much more suitable place to stay with far less chance of being harassed by law enforcement. That is, as long as you pay for ones campsite. I suppose also that it is all about how one looks at it. I would think it would be a great place to stay, but I am not really homeless, and I have a mindset of being able to enjoy this experience with Shiloh. This is why I am here, and I am also taking advantage of this situation to study and observe nature. I see it as a journey Shiloh and I are going on. I am sure he is dwelling on his misfortune and would rather be making money then being in nature. And this is understandable considering the feeling of uncertainty for the future – especially when one sees themselves as being homeless, and without work. I can’t really call myself as being really homeless, because I have a place to stay with a roof over my head and a place to work, with some work, at least temporarily. But it was uncertain for me where we would live until my friend offered me a place to stay. I was also fortunate enough to have some work to keep me going. I think most people would find themselves very bored and miserable if they were forced to camp just to have a place they could stay temporarily.

All LJ pretty much does during the day is drink beer, listen to hideous music, sleep and eat and talks to anyone who will talk to him. He is a nice guy, but I am not here to hang out with people. I suppose, if it was a beautiful woman, I might reconsider.

Like LJ, so many Americans relies on the outside world to determine who they are as a person, our value, and the values society places on us of who we are – especially when it seems like the world, as with our lives are collapsing under our feet, and it seems we are falling into a deep abyss, seemly with no way of getting out. We feel a sense of failure, and worthlessness. Darkness falls upon our being, with no light at the end of the tunnel. Even if our situation, was caused by outside elements beyond our control, we blame ourselves for it.

I have been at this place of despair, and hopelessness. And I could have easily fallen into this trap again. But while thinking about what I was going to do, I thought this could be a good opportunity to experience our home in Nature. And I made a choice to enjoy this experience with Shiloh, as with deeply experiencing the wonders, and beauty of Nature. I always loved being in Nature, but never truly felt a deep connection with her. But it seemed it was growing slowing inside of me – continually I was being drawn to her like a silent whisper in the wind. And I would follow this silent voice that was awakening me on Nature, and in my Being. Maybe, it was always there, but took time to realize it.

It was hard losing my horses, because they brought me closer to Nature, as with appreciating, and loving these incredible animals. It was always enjoyable being around them, even cleaning their paddocks, or just brushing them. Lacy would always swing her back end towards me so I would rub the inside of her rear legs. The lady that took Lacy. When she walked over to Lacy, Lacy swung her back end towards her, and she know instantly what to do. I knew she was the right one for Lacy. As I may have mentioned before, Lacy preferred women riding her. I was fortunate I found them good homes, and just had to except what was.

It is unfortunate that in today’s world, we tend to see people who are considered homeless as undesirables, and wishing they would just go away. We tend not to wonder, or ask of their story. Even when this economic meltdown was caused by a few, and even benefited from this disaster, and were not punished criminally, when so many suffered, lost their homes, with no place to go. Many jobs were lost, businesses closing, and retirements lost, with very little recourse by the governments. And all due to greed.

There is no guarantee one will ever experience homelessness in their lifetime. In America, people view this condition or social illness as something that must be seriously wrong with people that are homeless. But people who thought they were secure in their life and immune from any possibility of this ever happening to them, are now happening to millions of people in the United States – to men, women and children. The government did very little for the common good of it’s people, but only in rewarding the rich. These situations will continue to play out, until we fix our broken, greed driven, and corrupt system.

During this rewrite at the end of 2011. As of 2009, there were 643,067 who were homeless and another 1.56 million who used a shelters for a short time. That is 1 in every 200 Americans who were homeless at least for a short period of time. A large percentage of this is caused by the economy which really has not gotten any better.

Most of our month stay here is to observe and study nature – the flora and fauna. It is also to experience camping alone and camping for a longer period of time. I hope to possibly learn a few survival skills along the way, but being in a park campground this has its limitations because of the restriction and rules that apply. Practicing many of the survival skills I want to practice will have to be put off for another day, as with other less restricted areas.

A few books I brought along are The Audubon Society Field Guides to North American Birds, and Wild Flowers and Trees. I did not realized that the learning I was hoping to do will take much longer than just a month and I will soon realized I only scratched the surface of knowledge that nature provides. But it is a beginning.

I did learn a good and valuable lesson, and that is, take the time to learn in depth the tree structure, and habitats, as well as the structure, growing seasons, and habitats of the plants and flowers. It will make identifying the trees, and plants much easier. Just going by the images of trees, plants, and flowers can easily cause misidentification. I began doing it by images only, because I was being lazy, and it became very frustrating trying to identifying anything. In learning the proper way to identify trees, and plants, it makes it much more enjoyable and creates a deeper connection with the natural world. At least from my perspective.

I know if Shiloh was not with me in these hard times it would be very different, and in many ways much more difficult. He has become more than just a dog, he is my friend, and companion on this journey and the responsibility I have in keeping him safe and healthy are always on my mind. It keeps me focused on other then just me, and knowing I will not be walking alone. He was my pillar of strength.

In the truer sense of camping alone in this type of camping area is that you are not really alone. There are always people around. It may not be campers, but people that use it for day use and all the employees that work at the park. You are also very close to civilization and if an emergency happened, you could be cared for within an hour or so. I found later on my journey in rediscovering nature that being alone in a park setting compared to being alone in the wilderness is like the difference between night and day. But for me, the fewer the people the better in any of these camping situations. It provides a more peaceful, and quiet environment to observe Nature, and feel a peace within that we are all connected.

Being in this beautiful natural setting with Shiloh, I was thinking of my other dog, Shawnee. She would have been here as well, if I did not have to put her down a year and half earlier. She was only four years old when I had to put her to sleep. She was a year older than Shiloh and matured into a very independent girl with a mind of her own. She was extremely intelligent and used it to her advantage. She would have probably been a handful being here, but I really do miss her and wish she was with us.

Shiloh does great off leash. He likes to just hang out around camp and does not really wander. On the other hand, Shawnee would have been another matter. On other trips we have taken together and one camping trip in particular, Shawnee would take off to explore and Shiloh would always follow behind her. It was like, she would say to Shiloh, “let ditch dad and have some fun,” and Shiloh would say, “okay!” I was always concerned with Shawnee’s safety when she was off leash and as for a camping companion, Shiloh has been great.

Shawnee will always be in my heart and every time Shiloh and I were off camping this year, Shawnee was always with us in spirit. That way she wouldn’t get in trouble.

The days are beginning to warm up and so are the amount of bugs that are about. They are beginning to show their presence. March was a very wet month, and warm weather in April was a welcome change. There is suppose to be a chance of rain tonight, but the morning skies showed no sign of that. Not a cloud in sight.

Like everything else in today’s world that has changed, real camping is becoming a lost experience, except for those who still choose to keep that tradition alive. Many now have motor homes, RV’s and campers to replace the tent. To me they are just an eye sore in Nature, and shouldn’t be allowed. At least limit the size. I suppose back in the olden days, campers who slept under the stars, with just a bed roll, or canvas tarp for protection from the weather. It is nice to have some comforts when you are in nature camping, but at the same time keeping it to a minimum, will provide more of an out in Nature experience.

Though Del Valle is only a short distance away from the city of Livermore. once you arrive at Del Valle, you feel you are hundreds of miles away from civilization with the exception of the manicured campgrounds and picnic areas. And of course, all the people on the weekends. and their presents remaining, by the trash they leave behind. I guess you can’t expect more then that since it is called a recreational area.

I noticed while taking my dogs to the dog. park I would take my dogs to had an incredible view of the valley, the foothills and Mt. Diablo to the east. On the opposite side to the west edge of the park lay grass covered foothills with scattered oak trees and some sorts of shrubs. There was an incredible amount of wildlife in this relatively small area that animals visited and often visible to the people at the dog park, but very few noticed them. There were coyote that would visit, deer, turkey, quail, red-tailed hawk, white-tailed kites, crows, a variety of song birds, rabbits, mice, snakes, lizards, Canadian geese, occasionally a Great Blue Heron and egret would drop by for a visit and we had for about two years a lone pheasant looking for a mate. Unfortunately he never found one there. Occasionally we would have a young coyote come down close to the dog park fence and begin to bark and yelp at the dogs. It was an enjoyable sight. I remember once a roost of turkey in the oak trees were be harassed by a coyote and soon the turkeys turned the tide on the coyote, where the coyotes were being harassed by the turkeys. It was like watching a nature in live action before our eyes. We had all this wildlife to enjoy, but for most of the people in the park, they would typically miss it with their tunnel vision. We have become numb to Nature.

When one truly experiences the outdoors, in Nature, one has the sense of freedom, a sense of wonder and a sense of connectedness to all things. We begin to see things that most people miss and we begin to feel our connection with nature – a connection with the trees, the plants and with the animals. Mindless entertainment begins to vanish, and is now directed at watching nature and seeing nature, listening to her voices at work as she begins to show herself to us. But, we must begin by learning in becoming silent in this dimension, and let Nature begin to unfold her mysteries and wonders within our consciousness, in our pure awareness. We become awakened to the real Truth.

It is ironic I am sitting in camp and watching a park employee cutting the plants and the grasses down in the campsites to make it pleasing to the eye for the visiting campers. While the park employee is cutting away at the plant life, we (visitors) are not allowed to pick any plants or flowers, pick up or disturb any animals or kill any animals in any of our regional parks except for fish of course. Maybe this is a good thing. I am not sure if insects count on this list.

I personally think fish get a bad rap. It seems like they don’t really count for anything except in the recreation category. Del Valle is a popular spot for fishing. There can be some whoppers caught here at the reservoir. They also come with warning signs that consumption should be limited, or avoided depending on the fish species.

These rules we are required to obey are due to our disrespect, and being irresponsibility towards nature, as to our fellow campers. We would not need such rules if we behaved properly in the natural environment.

Similar rules should apply to corporations that pillage the land for natural resources or industries that feel free to pollute the environment with their waste products. The mining, the petroleum, the natural gas, and the chemical industries, our farming practices, and other ventures continuing to pollute our lands, our air, and our water, with little regard for causing devastating impacts on our environment and the health of our planet.

Del Valle is a good example of showing little respect for a place that offers such a diverse ecosystem and incredible beauty, by dumping trash throughout the park, and not cleaning up after oneself. Even when the park does a great job of supplying adequate trash cans throughout the park people still choose to throw it on the land, that impacts people, and Nature.

One of my primary goals for this month of camping was to study and identify plants and trees. I have found studying plants as well as trees to be very overwhelming because of the abundance of plants and the many species of trees. Relying just on photos in field guides are useful but is not the right approach to take. I would learn this lesson very quickly. It took me a year to realize, you have to thoroughly familiarize yourself with the parts and terms of plants, as with the parts of the trees, their bark, leaves and flowers to properly identify them. For me, it makes it much easier to identify flora and a much more enjoyable process. It can still be a slow and meticulous process until one gains the experience, knowledge and confidence that only time will allow. Throughout the summer it became easier for me to identify plants and trees, but still much more difficult not having the proper basic knowledge needed for the identification of plants and trees.

I had a good day spotting new birds in the area, a robin earlier in the day and finally a red-tailed hawk late afternoon as with a steller’s jay. While walking the lake I saw a common tern in the lake. There were a number of them swimming in the lake a few days ago. I also found the bald eagles nest across the lake, and a different spotted woodpecker in our camp, but could not identify it.